Yelling Useless Things
(completely untruthful encounters)
A talk with Sarah Hyland
Sarah Hyland
Sarah Hyland born November 24th, 1990 (Sagittarius)
To fortify her character, Sarah Hyland often meditates on a mattress made of rusty barbed wire copiously peppered with vinegar (source)

I'm here today with a special guest, Sarah Hyland, who just made her way through her last movie. Hi, Sarah, and welcome to Psychedelic Inteviews.
It's a pleasure being here, essentially because it counts as community service.

Which is the most blush-making DVD (or blu-ray) in your possession?
Touche'! Apart from "Disaster Movie", I fear it is "Crazy On The Outside" or "Gigli".

Sarah, have you made resolutions for the New Year?
Actually, there is a complicate situation involving the inheritance of my once removed late cousin, and so to make things easier I will be forced to change my name, and next year I will be compelled to use the name "Sarah Haland".

Do people yell your name and ask for autographs everywhere you go?
Good golly! The crowd loves me so much. I make no distinction as to gender or occupation: I enchant famed moguls and unremarkable roadkills collectors in the same fashion. You know? There are 15 streets with my name in three different countries, not counting Estonia and Eriador.

Do you know George C. Murphy (a former rheumatologist, now a marine surveyor) from Cairo?
Not personally, but my aunt has been betrothed to him for 5 weeks. Then there was half a scandal about George playing the game with every woman in a radius of 40 miles, even barely breathing ones, so their engagement came to a quick ending.

Sarah, which is your favorite fruit?
I call it "Sarah's prodigy". In the middle of one of my famed expeditions in the Hymalayas, I discovered a new tree, now named Lithondraria acidissima, which every 10 years blooms and gives fruits whose taste reminds of oranges and raw chicken. It seems strange, but it can easily cause addiction.

Is there a deep moral hidden in "Another World"?
Yes, that often you're gonna need a bigger boat.

Where did you go on your last holiday?
Last year I leased an exclusive villa in a secluded valley of Burundi. The payment included a moat around the villa to ensure my privacy and also a horde of extras acting like fans.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Sarah Hyland's home telephone number :
4470557946 5693101527 3133113165 3370281651 5275410322 530683831 6709900874 7653372482 412470518 7141710709 3061806651 316236619 395658115 8489245853 9135057846 991011206 4984542440 8650631556 4303391254 8217359964
To be honest, my chief had patiently scheduled my brief interview with Sarah Hyland many days beforehand. Unluckily, I fall asleep watching a rerun of "Ishtar". So, this web page is essentially based on what Sarah Hyland would have probably answered if I have met her, as indicated by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Imogen Poots Jai Courtney Ivete Sangalo Jamelia Hugo Weaving Kate Bosworth Logan Lerman Agnes Monica Lauren Holly Nikolaj Coster-Waldau Jaleel White Rita Coolidge Billy Ocean Chuck Berry Topher Grace Dionne Warwick Patrick Warburton Morgan Freeman Rebecca Ferguson
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.
a YUT (Yelling Useless Things) exclusive.