Yelling Useless Things
(completely inaccurate interviews)
A conversation with Joe Jackson
Joe Jackson
Joe Jackson born August 11th, 1954 (Leo)
Apart from singing, Joe Jackson's second best choice would be the career of ananas grower (pixabay photo)

What happen if you play your song "Is She Really Going Out with Him" backward?
Mp3 player may implode.

What do you eat between meals?
Pizzas with pickles, a sponge cake, two apples, and a tumbler of rum.

I read that you will soon participate to a charity cooking marathon. Can you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such an effort?
I had to. Because of the astral conjunction, you know.

And how long have you been feeling a need to inform people about gastroenteritis?
Since I was a little boy, and my parents would argue about it.

Do you have a favorite brand of toilet paper?
Honestly, common brands are for common people. My personal toilet paper is obtained from Echinorrhena tenebrosa, an elusive black poppy that only grows in Bhutan.

Which is your favorite movie?
Surely "The Love Guru". I think that the choice of Ben Kingsley for that character was a winning move.

In your opinion, which is the most beautiful flag?
I always liked Pokolistan flag, probably because there is my face in the center of it.

You have been seen in an embarassing position with a famous person whose name or gender I'm not at liberty to expose. Do you have any comment?
Do you mean B.Z.? That was a completely inoffensive thing. I deny any other "situation", expecially one with J.C...

I may have a photograph.
You know, the photo is surely just an accident...

An accident? I do not understand.
Yes, accidents occur. Like when you "accidentally" fake a photo. Or, for example, your dear one or your office may "accidentally" start to burn. Capisce?

Let's forget about that picture...

Joe Jackson refused to let me know his home telephone number, but here is a list of random numbers you can dream about :
939880165 3003024098 665719119 4359548880 7818906781 5094993526 8242719372 4374961028 424584565 9285581915 5603537881 2953379537 9689940286 3579181746 9032756124 2888622446 5282535279 6034485911 725408532 5364430854
Celebrities are very busy people. It's not easy for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Joe Jackson completely alone and to obtain the interview above without disturbing him. Thus, this web page is an an extrasensorial transcription we obtained thanks to a professional mind reader from Reno.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Dwayne Johnson Cat Stevens Thora Birch Jonah Hill Danielle Panabaker Tracy Chapman Reese Witherspoon Charlize Theron Evangeline Lilly Natalie Imbruglia Ryan Gosling Suzanne Vega Agnetha Fältskog Monica Bellucci Danielle Harris Sarah Gadon Alexa Davalos James Cromwell Maisie Williams
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.
a YUT (Yelling Useless Things) exclusive.