Yelling Useless Things
(very bogus interviews)
A conversation with Sophie Turner
Sophie Turner
Sophie Turner born February 21st, 1996 (Pisces)
Using a false name, Sophie Turner has partecipated and has been expelled from the latest Beard and Moustache Championship (source)

Do you have any scar?
I have a tiny coffee bean shaped scar on my left forearm, the result of my traumatic brawl with a deranged weasel.

Do you know Melissa Hill (a former programmer, now a flying instructor) from Fort Lauderdale?
No, I don't, but my cousin has been briefly married to her. Then there was a rumor about some unconventional photographs sent by phone to the wrong people, so their marriage came to a quick ending.

Your zodiac sign is Pisces. May I read you your horoscope?
OK, my fans say I'm a sucker for zodiacal foolishness.

You have gathered a great deal of discontent in you that can explode without notice. You will feel yourself again only if you forgive or murder somebody who has angered you in the past.
Frick! That's incredible!

Sophie, you appear to be always so sunny and joyful. Do you also have a dark side?
It's difficult to confess it, but I do. Each of us has two sides. At times, when I bump into a colleague actress, disgust makes my bones shake and irritation darkens my heart. And all of a sudden, I fight the urge to erase that dunce from the earth and tap dance on her icy tomb. That is my amiable side... I let you figure out how my dark side is.

When you were a little girl, did you see acting as a possible profession?
Sure thing! Even though it actually was my second choice. First one was pope. Or maybe IT clerk, I could never decide.

Do you like to cook?
To be honest, I think that preparing meals is a waste of energy. After all, there are cafeterias and diners willing to deliver my daily RDA of fats and sugars. In the few occasions I oblige to cook for my disciples, I like to design salads. My cornerstone is a mix of beef jerk and seaweeds, which I believe can satisfy both vegs and normal people.

Interesting! Would you like to share the recipe with us?
By all means! You take the beef jerk and the seaweeds and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some whole-grain buns.

Whole-grain buns?
It does not matter, my recipe derives from one for sandwiches. So you make those sandwiches, then you dispose of the bread and mix beef jerk and seaweeds with some Alfredo sauce and voilĂ , you are done!

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Sophie Turner's secret telephone number :
8993886301 2991540335 9978460131 927514351 2236610270 3163347750 3916244844 3722267332 271493784 6377629357 8580999508 735844579 5805360764 910730161 8917096090 7026888266 3585355797 3901422894 9979550918 5168670675
Vips are busy people. It's difficult for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Sophie Turner alone and to obtain the interview above without her help. Thus, this web page is an a psychic transcription we obtained thanks to a trained mentalist.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Molly Ringwald Salma Hayek Rene Russo Emilia Clarke Justin Theroux Rachel Nichols Piper Perabo Elijah Wood Maggie Siff Natalie Martinez Sean Diddy Combs Demi Lovato Gillian Anderson Jamie Campbell Bower Chloe Bennet Sherilyn Fenn Jennifer Lawrence Drea de Matteo Michael B. Jordan
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.
a YUT (Yelling Useless Things) exclusive.