Do people scream your name and ask for autographs everywhere you go?
Absolutely! I'm like a medicine, a good one, for the mass. I really make no distinction as to race, sex, or religion: I delight wealthy tycoons and discouraged roadkills collectors in the same manner. You know? There are at least 15 parks with my statue in three different countries, not counting Bhutan and Bangistan, which I did not know they were countries.
Which is your favorite snack?
Chicken breasts with ranch dressing, a salted peanut, two kale leaves, and a tumbler of scotch.
Could you suggest a remedy for hay fever?
Yes, here it is my fantastic relief for hay fever. Mix two parts of whiskey, three parts of ground coffee and some margarine in a bowl, then put the resulting brew on your arms and your feet.
Can you tell me the square root of 9960307915?
I've no doubts that one of the possible answers is something around 18.
What’s the best sound in the world?
I think it is the calming whisper of a roll of new banknotes touching each other. However, my agent prefers you write instead something more fashionable, like "the heartening laugh of an innocent kid " or "the consoling purr of a lovable kitten".
What would you like to do right now?
Take a stroll without you in a strawberry field.
You have been the recipient of several prizes. Which is the first prize you ever won?
At the early age of 6, I won the "Silver Squirrel Trophy" assigned by the Mayor of Atlanta for "phenomenal and superfluous acting accomplishment".
What would A.J. Cook do to solve the issue of criminality and ferocity that is menacing present-day society?
Well, I think that assigning a security guard to every citizen can make many issues go away, but most administrators are just selfish aged blokes.
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