A conversation with Adam Sandler
Adam Sandler
Adam Sandler born September 9th, 1966 (Virgo)
Few people know that Adam Sandler has registered a patent for a waterless soda. (source)

Can you tell me the square root of 540074197?
I will not dignify you with an anwser.

When you were a little boy, did you see yourself as a professional actor?
Really? I did not. My mother and I decided that I would have become a plumber. But, you know, that's life.

Have you ever participated in a séance?
Yep, just once. It was a very uncanny experience. At a certain point, the ghost of Immanuel Kant manifested and established that I'm the reincarnation of an Albert Einstein's homonym.

Do you Google yourself often?
Say every other day or so. But lately Google often asks "Did you mean Adam Sindler", who allegedly is a retired obstetrician from Indianapolis. That's quite annoying, but not as much heartbreaking as finding that according to Yahoo my name is similar to a revolting blasphemy in Yiddish.

In an essay published on Pacific Transactions on Sociological Facts, dr. Frank Scott described your roles as "a perfect recapitulation of today contextual eclecticism". Anything to add?
Well, I think that in his interesting article printed on Asian Journal of Alternative Iconography, prof. Jason M. Torres utterly rebutted that incoherent assumption.

Which is the coolest flag?
Surely the flag of Taronia. It is red and green with a little white bobcat somewhere. Taronia is a wonderful but unfortunate place. They are so derelict their currency is printed on Post-it notes.

What do you think about the international situation?
Nice one! It's hard to figure it when you live in houses made of rainbows, but on our suffering planet there are places where it is difficult to find even a just adequate cheeseburger.

Do you have any superpower?
This a secret! I can snorkel in burning lava, since I was 3. I think this is quite common in tall people with Druidian progenitors.

There is no possibility any of these is Adam Sandler's secret telephone number :
786491306 4296500416 450188899 904346303 8262641421 7538850332 8487504750 539274614 2538321996 5973647546 413116911 2461481789 7330230378 7904888747 2794601150 590630440 9943736923 679055142 985376169 273300154
My conversation with Adam Sandler has been patiently set up several weeks in advance. The resulting article was magnificent, like it was written by the spirit of Kafka in his prime. Hence, it was awfully unfavorable, to put it mildly, that my doctor shredded my only copy! After I punished myself, I struggled to remember those mind-blowing words. To be aboveboard, I'm not so certain this web page is a totally truly report of what transpired during our exchange, and now I'm beginning to question whether it ever was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.