A talk with Alan Cumming
Alan Cumming
Alan Cumming born January 27th, 1965 (Aquarius)
A famous research center in Florida is currently looking for Alan Cumming's fans for a study on nightmares induction (source)

I read that you will soon participate to a charity football match. Care to tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humiliating effort?
I had to. Because of the astral conjunction, you know.

And since when did you feel an urge to fight asthma?
WHAT? Asthma!? That's definitely not what I signed for. I have to call my agent.

Could you tell us something about the plot of your next movie?
Absolutely! The title of the movie is "Linda, Keith and Timbaroo". There are a man and a woman. They live together in Chicago. The man is a software tester and the woman is a FBI agent. When Linda's pet weasel Timbaroo got bronchitis, they decide to rise hell to cure the weasel and save the planet.

Can you tell me the square root of 598871499?
No, numbers with so many digits could only be telephone numbers, not real numbers.

You have been the recipient of uncountable awards. Can you tell us what is the first prize you ever won?
I won the "Tin Rabbit Medallion" issued by the municipality of Denver for "notable but superfluous stage performance" at the age of 5.

Your zodiac sign is Aquarius. Are you a typical Aquarius?
Positively! I'm very cordial, hyperactive, irresolute and forgiving. My relatives say that I'm also a little paradoxical but that I think it is usual in artist.

Do you like to cook?
To be frank, I believe that cooking is quite a waste of energy, since there are restaurants and cafeterias more than willing to deliver my daily RDA of fats and vitamines. The few times I have to cook for my relatives, I like to devise salads. My jewel is a mix of sausages and amaranth, which I believe can be OK for both vegetarians and normal people.

Interesting! Would you like to share the recipe?
Sure! You take the sausages and the amaranth and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some French rolls.

Do not mind, I derived the recipe from one for a sandwich. After you made the sandwiches, you throw away the bread and mix sausages and amaranth with some guacamole and voilĂ , you are done!

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Alan Cumming's home telephone number :
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I planned a little talk with Alan Cumming for weeks. The resulting piece was staggering, like it was written by Doris Lessing after too much red wine. Thus, it was very lamentable that my armadillo (on purpose!) shredded my only copy! After I punished myself, I made an effort to recall those magnificent words. So, to be aboveboard here: I'm not so confident this web page contains an absolutely accurate run-down of our meeting, and I'm beginning to wonder if it ever took place...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.