Alan, your zodiac sign is Pisces. May I read you your horoscope?
Please proceed, but I'm a bit partial regarding zodiacal folly.
Today a worrisome apprehension and a heavy burden of insomnia are ruining your ability to smooth confrontations, but compared to next Sunday today is full of joy, so good luck.
For cryin' out load! You are dead on!
What is the fuss about the current Oscar debate?
To be frank, this is a minefield.
What would you like to do right now?
Take a stroll with you in a strawberry field.
Which is the most shameful DVD in your possession?
My my! Excluding "Swept Away", which was a gift, probabably it is "Battlefield Earth" or "Jack and Jill".
I've heard you are writing a book. Would you like to share with us a few details?
The actual details on my imminent book will soon be printed in another book. What I can divulge here is that it will be my unofficial autobiography. It will be tattoed on legs and arms of 700 fans that will be freed in Bakersfield.
Where do you go when you die?
Inside a wooden overcoat, generally. If you are burned then your ashes can occupy space on somebody's coffee table.
Do you have any birthmark?
Yes, I do. I have a little macaron shaped birthmark on my right elbow. Probably my mother did unintentionally swallow a macaron when she was pregnant.
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