An interview with Albert Hammond
Albert Hammond
Albert Hammond born May 18th, 1944 (Taurus)
An acclaimed clinic in Indiana is presently looking for Albert Hammond's fans for a study on sleep deprivation (source)

Albert, is there a deep meaning hidden in your "It Never Rains in Southern California"?
Yes, that you can be anything that you want to be.

An imaginary character you recognize as similar to you in spirit?
In a sense, Mr Bean, because of our similar way of living. In my ideal world we both enjoy the company of cute chipmunks.

How famous are you, on a scale of one to ten?
I'm not sure. Probably, I'm a one in Boston, but a seven in Iceland.

When you were a little boy, did you see yourself as a professional singer?
Sadly no, and I still hope that, one day, I will get a patent for my ant treadmill.

According to some witnesses, you have been in an embarassing position with a star whose name I've not the permission to release. Do you care to comment?
I deny any "situation", expecially one with Z.A..

I may have a photograph.
Well, the photo is probably just an accident...

An accident? I do not understand.
Yes, accidents are known to occur all the time. Like when you accidentally take a double exposure. Or, for example, your office may be "accidentally" swarmed by the CIA looking for some felonious material a guy may have "accidentally" hidden there. Do you understand now?

I was just mocking you, there is absolutely no photo...

Albert Hammond refused to divulge his private telephone number, but here is a list of random numbers you can dream about :
772174546 2401433938 7061990147 5608558514 7728195070 9743193375 5586732065 6203805195 2149156000 5158793596 3296738593 717071250 4281613755 6551383802 935808617 992611885 9735979838 9407828917 784945358 926918928
To be honest, my chief had patiently arranged my short exchange with Albert Hammond several weeks beforehand. Unluckily, my pet lion got pneumonia, so I had to skip the appointment. So, the transcript above is essentially based on what Albert Hammond would have probably said if I have met him, as indicated by a telephonic poll involving a couple of his fans.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.