A conversation with Austin Mahone
Austin Mahone
Austin Mahone born April 4th, 1996 (Aries)
Austin Mahone is convinced that in an alternative universe he is a doughnut (pixabay photo)

Austin, your zodiac sign is Aries. May I read you your horoscope?
Positively! But I don't believe in zodiacal madness.

You have gathered a lot of discontent inside you that can discharge at any moment. You will feel better only if you forget or murder somebody who has injured you in the past.
Yeep! You are dead on!

Imagine that there is somebody who'd never heard your songs. How would you describe your music to him?
It is difficult to figure there is somebody so sorrowful! As my fans often say, my music is like a luscious vanilla cake with a shocking inner core of vinegar.

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Most of the times I consume super-natural alternative products, because I care about my beauty and our mother Earth. For example, this week I have a fascination for moringa fruits and kale chips, both amazing on chicken nuggets.

Apart from singing, what one thing do you do exceptionally well?
I can deliver "Hope is the Thing with Feathers" by Emily Dickinson backwards in 6 different languages including Chinese.

I read that you will soon participate to a charity concert. Can you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humble effort?
I had to for a clause in my last contract, which forced me to increase the number of charity events I participate to.

And since when did you feel an urge to fight bubonic plague?
Oh, since always.

Is there something you would like to do right now?
Sure. Read the obit of a clown.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Austin Mahone's home telephone number :
2704634341 758032762 6873073319 8656064049 5180225217 2030509836 6184306197 293938815 9371551885 6938844719 3991497157 5581884656 439766810 387815191 9547148941 7654281784 9449918504 419730543 4707741544 7106178708
My supervisor had patiently planned my short talk with Austin Mahone days beforehand. Unluckily, I got stoned watching a rerun of "Wild Hogs". So, the interview above is essentially based on what Austin Mahone would have probably said if I have met him, as suggested by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.