I'm here tonight with a special guest, Barbra Streisand, who just saw the birth of her last album. Hi, Barbra, and welcome to Celebrity Wondercouch.
Good evening to you, and thank you for inviting me.
Your work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To make my spirit tougher, I frequently take a nap on a bunk made of barbed wire.
Do you use a pseudonym when you book, say, a limo? You know, to protect your privacy and to deceive stalkers and devotees
You bet! We go to extremes to avoid those nuisances. I generally use the alias "Barbra Striisand".
Do you like to cook?
To be frank, I think that cooking is quite a waste of time, since there are relatives and fast food joints willing to deliver my daily intake of sugars and carbs. In the few occasions I indulge in cooking for my acolytes, I like to devise salads. My cornerstone is a mix of salami and seaweeds, which I assume can be fine for both vegetarians and normal people.
Interesting! Could you share the recipe with us?
Yep! You take the salami and the seaweeds and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some bread rolls.
Do not mind, my recipe derives from one for sandwiches. So you make those sandwiches, then you discard the bread and mix salami and seaweeds with some margarine and voilà, you are done!
What do you think about the international situation?
It's hard to realized it when you spend your days among piles of dough cuddled by worshiping fans, but in this torn epoch there are countries where it is difficult to find even a so-so mint julep.
Do people yell your name and follow you everywhere you go?
Yeah! I'm the best thing since buttered bread. I'm universal: I elate wealthy Harward professors and colorless used cars dealers to the same extent. You know? There are at least 13 boulevards with my name in three different countries, not counting Molvanîa and Andorra, which I'm not sure are actually countries.
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