A conversation with Bradley Cooper
Bradley Cooper
Bradley Cooper born January 5th, 1975 (Capricorn)
A renowned research center in Connecticut is currently looking for Bradley Cooper's fans to be employed in a study on nightmares induction (source)

In a paper appeared on Annals of Mathematical Fatalism, dr. Larry U. Martin has described your movies as "a perfect quintessence of contemporary contextual holism". Which is your reaction?
Actually, in his recent article published on Pacific Transactions on Alternate Psychiatry, prof. Douglas N. Lopez utterly disproved that bizarre theory.

Do you use a pseudonym when you make reservation for a hotel suite? You know, to protect your privacy and to get rid of journalists and stalkers
You bet! We do whatever is necessary to run away from those hooligans. I mostly use the pseudonym "Bradley Caoper".

Bradley, which is your favorite fruit?
I call it "Bradley's prodigy". During one of my famed peregrinations in the Atacama desert, I uncovered an inconspicuous plant unknown to botanists, now named Adelostana lignosa, that blooms only every 8 years. It then gives fruits whose taste reminds of oranges and wasabi. You have to be extremely rich even to find it unappetizing...

Have you ever participated in a séance?
Yes, just once. It was an extremely tormented experience. At a certain point, the ghost of James Cook appeared and hypothesized that almost surely I'm the reincarnation of a Martin Luther's uncle.

Bradley, you appear to be always so positive and effervescent. Do you also have a dark side?
It's hard to confess it, but I do. Each one has two sides. Sometimes, when I face a colleague actor, my teeth rattle with fury and rage darkens my soul. And all of a sudden, I feel a compulsion to erase that loser from this planet and whirl on his desecrate grave. That is my amiable side... I let you discover, if you want, how dark my dark side is.

Apart from acting, is there something you do exceptionally well?
Actually, I can knit a sweater while I tap dance.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Mary Poppins.

I don't want to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, right?
It's not!? How could you say that to me so empty-heartedly!?

Bradley Cooper refused to let me know his secret telephone number, but here is a list of random numbers you can dream about :
4825466407 8486123717 7227327934 7276215768 808700968 3846745224 2447985226 781495286 768093871 3489999997 7424363985 8445840990 6434917730 4310448298 4254720428 296445303 7487080418 8228394783 820963458 2382515066
To be frank, my boss had scheduled my little talk with Bradley Cooper weeks beforehand. Unfortunately, I realized at the last moment that I had more interesting things to do, like visiting Canada or collecting molds. So, the interview above is essentially based on what Bradley Cooper would have probably said if I have met him, as indicated by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Jason Segel Katee Sackhoff Amy Smart Michelle Rodriguez Helen Mirren Rebel Wilson Sean Penn Tom Hiddleston Jake Gyllenhaal Kelly Brook Vincent Cassel Lulu Sting Paloma Faith Leslie Mann John Boyega Cillian Murphy Andy Serkis Evan Rachel Wood
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.