An interview with Bruce Willis
Bruce Willis
Bruce Willis born March 19th, 1955 (Pisces)
And now, instead of Spanish inquisition, enjoy a photo of a nice cat (pixabay photo)

Which is your favorite book?
I've quite a soft spot for "The Help" by Kathryn Steinback.

You mean, by Kathryn Stockett?
I'm not used to be contradicted by irrelevant interviewers, and anyway I think I've heard it both ways.

Do you do your own shopping?
I hardly think so! Actually, I employ a team of Georgia Tech graduates to compile my grocery list and e-mail it to a crew of pro buyers spread around the world. For the garbs, I ever pay a gang of stand-in, each sharing with me the measure of one body part.

Bruce, where did you go on your last holiday?
Recently I leased an elegant manor on the hidden hills of Botswana. The deal included barbed wire everywhere to ensure my privacy but also a mob of extras acting like shutterbugs.

Which brand of toilet paper do you use?
I really can't use common brands. My hand-made toilet paper is obtained from the fibers of Cotondria arcana, an almost extinct bulb native of Markovia.

Bruce, you are always in fine fettle. How do you do that?
I have devised the Blue Diet: in January I eat only blue foods, like blueberries, robin's eggs, blue corn and my special Smurf stew.

Do you know the "word association" game? I say a word and you say quickly the first word that comes to mind. I begin with :
Q: cop.

Bruce : danger

Q: tungsten
Bruce : will

Q: friends
Bruce : vengeance

We are going nowhere fast...

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Bruce Willis' private telephone number :
5073050764 3465320784 8119319619 2280641316 5290243909 6023002977 948031248 9898838611 7374295458 592937920 522535890 325215057 6915752339 5731686875 3374121901 9317227959 9979802501 794763604 6506503166 3235151159
To be sincere, my supervisor had planned my interview with Bruce Willis several months beforehand. Unluckily, I decided I had more interesting things to do, like walking my pet bear or breeding mites. So, the transcript above is mainly based on what Bruce Willis would have probably answered if I have met him, as indicated by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
Other interviews worth checking:
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.