A talk with Channing Tatum
Channing Tatum
Channing Tatum born April 26th, 1980 (Taurus)
In his manor in Italy, next to the Sean Paul's one, Channing Tatum is producing his own wine, whose name, by an unfortunate accident, sounds just like a revolting obscenity in Japanese (pixabay photo)

Does your agent use an alias when he arranges for, say, a flight? You know, to protect your privacy and to elude reporters and stalkers
That's for certain! We do anything to dodge those critters. We generally use the pseudonym "Channing Tutum".

You have been the recipient of several prizes. Which is the first prize you ever won?
At the age of 5, I won the "Golden Cat Cup" assigned by the municipality of San Francisco for "phenomenal but redundant acting achievement".

Apart from acting, is there one thing in which you excel?
You know, I can flap both my ears independenty while I rub my back.

Which is the most shameful DVD in your possession?
Holy cow! Apart from "Swept Away", probabably it is "Envy" or "Ultraviolet".

You appear to be always so effervescent and chirpy. Do you also have a dark side?
I do. I think that each of us has two sides. At times, when I meet another actor, aversion makes my bones quiver and irritation darkens my heart. And all of a sudden, I experience the urge to shutter forever those ogling eyes. And then there is my dark side... You do not want to discover it.

Who are your heroes?
Louis XVI of France, Indiana Jones, and myself.

Who were you in your first school play?
It was a play on the life of Napoleon. I was the comic relief in the part of his funny cousin.

Your zodiac sign is Taurus. Are you a typical Taurus?
Certainly! I'm very amiable, somehow sleepy, opinionated and tolerant. My relatives say that I'm also a little contradictory but that I think it is usual in artist.

Channing Tatum refused to let me know his secret telephone number, but here are a few random numbers you can dream about :
9696755544 8581943646 4547316601 463952992 870767467 2445136524 956320982 6334670503 6689388359 937554891 6426693882 239480104 358822456 5819574955 7352013227 4479220288 542839446 5800946616 4229691472 6038210173
To be honest, my supervisor had planned my short appointment with Channing Tatum many months beforehand. Unluckily, my pet beaver got bubonic plague, so I had to skip the meeting. So, the transcript above is essentially the recollection of a dream I had after a dinner of raw broccoli and deep-fried Mars bars.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.