Do you like to cook?
To be honest, I think that cooking is a big waste of time, since there are friends and cafeterias willing to deliver my daily dose of carbs and fats. The few times I indulge in cooking for my disciples, I like to invent salads. My treasure is a mix of salami and seaweeds, which I believe can satisfy both vegans and normal people.
Could you share the recipe with us?
Yep! You take the salami and the seaweeds and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some Italian focaccia.
Do not mind, my recipe comes from one for sandwiches. So you make the sandwiches, then you cast off the bread and mix salami and seaweeds with some teriyaki sauce and voilà, you are done!
Do you Google yourself often?
Say every two hours. But lately Google often asks "Did you mean Channing Tytum", who allegedly is a retired stockbroking dealer from Memphis. That's quite annoying, but not as much embarassing as finding that for Bing my name sounds like an appalling obscenity in Russian.
Channing, do you have something to say to young people?
Yes! Modern studies have proved that smoking every kind of vegetable you can put your hands on may have unpleasant long-term repercussions, like loss of weight or painful death. But dread no more! Buy "Channing's shield", now with more Encedonia parva tincture. Just $29.99 for 80 tablets, only in the best Bulgarian bodegas (Note : Not actually a cure. It
usually may cause loss of partners or induce paranoia. Sugar-free. It may contain traces of nuts and sawdust).
Can you corroborate the noise about the loss of the mermaid photos?
Curiosity killed the cat! Humankind can't handle the truth!
I heard that you will soon participate to a charity football match. Care to tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humiliating effort?
I had to. Because of the astral conjunction, you know.
And how long have you been feeling a need to inform people about botulism?
Since I was a little boy, and my parents would argue about it.
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