A talk with Cheryl Cole
Cheryl Cole
Cheryl Cole born June 30th, 1983 (Cancer)
Cheryl Cole has been unhappy with the true situation and facilities of the ritzy resort she hastily chose from the catalog of the "Last Will Travels" tour operator (pixabay photo)

In a paper appeared on Australasian Ethical Studies, prof. Kenneth B. Parker described your songs as "a dramatic archetype of newfangled conceptual epicureanism". Which is your reaction?
Well, it is clear that in his last letter published on Bulgarian Transactions on Transcendental Irrationalism, dr. Henry Gutierrez completely disproved that depthless theory.

A well-known person you recognize as similar to you in spirit?
As my fans like to think, James I of England, because of our shared moral standings.

Can you tell me the square root of 821173244?
According to my fans one of the possible answers is 81.

Do people yell your name and follow you everywhere you go?
Surprise surprise! The mass loves me so much. I really make no distinction as to gender or occupation: I'm known to impress successful neurosurgeons and depressed accountants alike. You know? There are 13 boulevards with my name in two different countries, not counting Tonga and Rohan, which I did not know they were countries.

Cheryl, have you made plans for the New Year?
One of my most firm resolutions is to obtain a license for navigating my submarine.

Cheryl, do you have any superpower?
Hands invisibility. Maybe this is not so uncommon in stunning people with Romulan neighbors.

Do you like to cook?
To be frank, I believe that cooking is a waste of energy. After all, there are cafeterias and fast food joints willing to provide my daily RDA of fats and sugars. The few times I cook for my acolytes, I like to devise salads. My cornerstone is a mix of pulled pork and tofu, which I believe can be suited for both vegetarians and normal people.

Intriguing! Could you share the recipe with us?
Yeah! You take the pulled pork and the tofu and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some whole-grain buns.

Do not mind, I obtained the recipe from one for a sandwich. After you made the sandwiches, you discard the bread and mix pulled pork and tofu with some soy sauce and you are done!

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Cheryl Cole's secret telephone number is listed here :
8554492459 9937418328 7921272393 409048713 466455507 7580534205 436478898 7607139054 321032100 3697517977 3667157220 6222285069 3598630914 9335013257 2579189608 8483197537 9921404397 635166728 9239211382 580009711
My hurried interview with Cheryl Cole has been planned for months. The resulting interview was great, like it was written by the ghost of Henry James at his best. It was highly deplorable, to put it mildly, that my mother in law (probably on purpose!) ate my only copy! After I showed vital signs again, I attempted to recapture those amazing words. I want to be honest here: I'm not one hundred percent confident this web page contains a perfectly precise run-down of what transpired during our meeting, and so I'm starting to wonder if it actually took place...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.