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An interview with Christian Bale
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Christian Bale
Christian Bale born January 30th, 1974 (Aquarius)
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Writing his will, Christian Bale has provided that his body should be donated to aliens, as a welcome gift (source)

Who are your heroes?
Henry VIII of England, Ace Ventura, and myself.

Christian, can you share with us a memory of your role in "The Dark Knight"?
Endeed! The set was full of flies. They were coming outta the goddamn walls!.

Your zodiac sign is Aquarius. May I read you your horoscope?
I guess! But I don't believe in zodiacal chicanery.

You will ram into a sloshed stranger from Boston, a former turf grower named Robert with both ears on the same side of the head. He will approach you with a map allegedly signed by the notorious pirate Sir Henry Morgan, that places his stash in a submerged mine in Hawaii. Don't follow him home!
Great Scott! That seems too much clear-cut...

What is your take of the current Oscar quarreling?
Surely, this has always been a minefield.

Do you like to cook?
To be frank, I believe that cooking food is quite a waste of energy, since there are relatives and canteens willing to provide my daily dose of vitamines and carbohydrates. In the few occasions I oblige to cook for my acolytes, I like to design salads. My all time favorite is a mix of salami and soybeans, which I believe can accomodate both vegs and normal people.

Would you like to share the recipe with us?
Will do! You take the salami and the soybeans and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some whole-grain buns.

Sandwiches?
It does not matter, I derived the recipe from one for a sandwich. After you made the sandwiches, you throw away the bread and mix salami and soybeans with some gravy and voilĂ , there it is!

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Christian Bale's secret telephone number is listed here :
6451366108 9383074060 8592485988 542721324 246253372 4590933922 4445405474 8728000475 4086703493 4293284356 8795788076 8731400003 2452211017 5429009736 469179968 3958509529 5696044157 7855627817 2310308495 7934654285
Vips are very busy people. It's not easy for them to find the time for an interview. So we decided to leave Christian Bale alone and obtain the interview above without disturbing him. Therefore, this web page is an an algorithmic transcription we obtained via a computer program we supplied with all the available info about Christian.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.