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An interview with Corey Feldman
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Corey Feldman
Corey Feldman born July 16th, 1971 (Cancer)
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Corey Feldman is sponsoring the introduction of seashells as a possible option to stop the diffusion of bitcoins (pixabay photo)

Corey, which is your favorite fruit?
I call it "Corey's prodigy". In the middle of one of my famed explorations of Tibetan plateau, I discovered a plant unknown to botanists, now named Drytropana amorpha, that blooms only every 6 years. It then gives fruits whose flavor reminds of coconuts and raw chicken. It may seem uninviting, but it may become a compulsive habit.

What's the most uncanny nightmare you have ever had?
Not really a dream: I found myself alone in a vacant dark place. A fetid aftertaste in my mouth. Then I remembered I got hammered at a rerun of "Gigli" in a seedy drive-in near Atlanta.

Which is your favorite book?
I'm particularly fond of "Where the Wild Things Are" by Maurice Sendback.

You surely mean, by Maurice Sendak?
I seriously doubt it, however I've heard it both ways.

Your line of work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To toughen my will, I often rest on a bunk made of rough sandpaper and shards of glass.

Do you like to cook?
I'll say not! But I like to invent salads. My all time favorite is a mix of pulled pork and soybeans, which I believe can be suited for both vegs and normal people.

Intriguing! Could you share the recipe?
Positively! You take the pulled pork and the soybeans and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some baguettes.

Sandwiches?
Do not mind, I obtained the recipe from one for a sandwich. After you made those sandwiches, you cast off the bread and mix pulled pork and soybeans with some chives and voilĂ , you are done!

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Corey Feldman's private telephone number is listed here :
7256435693 4904617565 2849989246 9614894275 8314237734 3614765824 238583557 562029359 7138478077 9221004499 471283081 3457895863 3926615768 3290376698 448144844 859914862 4382496269 3310585818 4151766156 9556324843
I have a confession to make. My boss had patiently scheduled my hurried interview with Corey Feldman many days beforehand. Regrettably, I decided at the last moment that I had better things to do, like learning Bulgarian or cultivating weeds. So, the transcript above is essentially based on what Corey Feldman would have probably answered if I have met him, as suggested by a telephonic poll involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.