A conversation with Dakota Johnson
Dakota Johnson
Dakota Johnson born October 4th, 1989 (Libra)
In her castle in Spain, next to that owned by Dolly Parton, Dakota Johnson is producing her own wine, whose name, by an unfortunate coincidence, sounds like an awful obscenity in Chinese (pixabay photo)

Where do you go when you die?
If you have been kind, you go to Tahiti, if you have been monotonous you go to Quebec.

When your are not on the set, which is your main diversion?
I think that collecting buttons is quite relaxing.

You appear to be always so vivacios and sunny. Do you also have a dark side?
I do. Each one has two sides. At times, when I see another actress, my teeth chatter with fury and I tremble with aversion. And suddenly, I experience the need to erase that dimwit from my sight and jump on her bleak grave. That is my cheerful side... I let you imagine how dark my dark side is.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?

Not to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, right?
It's not!? How could you say that to me so empty-heartedly!?

Are you superstitious?
Might as well! I use to wear one indument inside-out before a relevant event.

Did you ever participated in a séance?
Oh yes! But just one time. It was a tormented experience. Suddenly, the spirit of Louis XVI of France appeared and certified that I'm probably the reincarnation of a neighbor of Nelson Mandela.

According to some witnesses, you have been in an embarassing position with a vip whose name or gender I'm not at liberty to announce. Do you care to comment?
If you mean U.D., then it was an absolutely irreproachable thing. I deny any other such "situation", expecially one with F.X...

I may have a photograph.
Well, I think the photo is just an impression...

An impression? I do not understand.
Yes, just an impression. Like when you have the impression everything is perfectly fine in your little life and then without a reason your office is searched by the SWAT looking for some wicked material a guy has planted there. Capiche?

I think you are right, this is probably a photo of my pet fox with a wig...

Dakota Johnson refused to divulge her secret telephone number, but here is a list of random numbers you can dream about :
2935911733 8944079216 5681405827 2842054216 2159545266 8293335958 4770477257 3930856254 689146183 6818879914 9328138868 636323263 7005640692 7859385193 7138543763 2920148538 3068479476 394491344 9245969427 6267960841
I patiently waited forever for a chance to have a hurried interview with Dakota Johnson. The resulting article was staggering, like it was written by the spirit of Beatrix Potter in her prime. It was very untoward, to put it mildly, that my doctor set my only copy on fire! After I slept over it, I attempted to extract from my failing neurons those wondrous words. Actually, to be aboveboard, I'm not really so certain this web page contains a perfectly factual account of our rendezvous, and so I'm starting to question whether it ever happened...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.