A conversation with Damon Wayans Jr.
Damon Wayans Jr.
Damon Wayans Jr. born November 18th, 1982 (Scorpio)
Limbo, the treasured pet rabbit of Damon Wayans Jr., also doubles as a hypocaloric treat in case of zombie attack (pixabay photo)

Could you tell us something about your future project?
I'm in the middle of filming the remake of "The Love Guru", an underestimated classic whose sense has not been perceived.

Do you have a favorite flag?
I think it is that of Novistrana. It is brown and yellow with a red gazelle in the middle. Novistrana is an amazing but unfortunate place. They are so penniless that theft is allowed from 4 to 5 AM.

Damon, you appear to be always so sunny and full of life. Do you also have a dark side?
It's hard to confess it, but I do. I do believe that each of us has two sides. For example, when I meet another actor, irritation darkens my soul and my vision blurs. And then, without warning, I sense an impulse to erase his jeering smile. That is my cheerful side... I let you figure out how my dark side is.

Can you tell me the square root of 386203739?
No, I thought that numbers with so many digits could only be telephone numbers.

Damon, what’s your worst habit?
Often I compulsively rap my fingers on any surface and also on other people's leg.

Do you remember which is the first prize you ever won?
At the age of 9, I won the "Copper Gazelle Award" issued by the city of Las Vegas for "superlative yet nonessential stage achievement".

Do you do your own shopping?
Positively no! Usually, I pay a gang of NASA dropouts to compile my grocery list and pass it along to a crew of pro buyers scattered around the globe. For the garbs, which are always critical, I ever retain a bunch of stand-in, each sharing with me one body part measure.

Do people yell your name and applaud everywhere you go?
Sheesh! I'm the best thing since sliced bread. I'm all-embracing: I'm known to captivate successful heirs and dejected bookkeepers to the same extent. Say, there are 12 streets with my name in three different countries, not counting Estonia and Blefuscu.

And now a bunch of numbers which are not Damon Wayans Jr.'s secret telephone number :
8748782105 9618916425 9939090470 224408291 3283136102 5507706475 5430393622 7897083705 4223303031 5068058944 9866337256 2734098885 2445127427 3398006652 6566207384 6609797320 917798190 3739956472 698842363 3503904818
I dawdled for many weeks before being able to have a little appointment with Damon Wayans Jr.. The resulting transcription was imposing, like "Great Expectations" rewritten by Mandrake. So, it was disastrous, to put it mildly, that my cousin Andrew (probably on purpose!) ate my only copy! After I sobered out, I tried to recall those stunning words. To be straight, I'm not one hundred percent confident this web page is a completely truthful chronicle of our meeting, and I'm starting to doubt it ever happened...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.