What do you have in your pockets?
Argh! A tricky question. Since this interview is a fantasy of your lascivious imagination, I'm totally au naturel, so no pockets at all.
When you were a little boy, did you see acting as a possible profession?
Yup! Even though it actually was my second choice. First one was pope. Or maybe electrician, I could never decide.
According to some witnesses, you have been in an embarassing situation with a star whose name I'm not at liberty to bring out in the open. Do you care to comment?
I deny any such "situation", expecially one with H.O..
I may have a picture.
Well, the photo has surely appeared spontaneously...
Spontaneously? I do not understand.
Yes, probably some wandering photons spontaneously conjured an absolutely random photo in which you erroneously spotted me. For example, given the right conditions, your car or your dear one may "spontaneously" take fire. Are we clear now?
Let's forget about that imaginary photo...
Do you use a pseudonym when you book, say, a flight? You know, to protect your privacy and to evade devotees and stalkers
You bet! We do whatever is necessary to ditch those hooligans. I usually adopt the pseudonym "Daniel Creig".
You have been the recipient of uncountable prizes. Do you remember which is the first prize you ever won?
At the early age of 7, I won the "Silver Sheep Medallion" issued by the municipality of Fresno for "impressive and nonessential stage exhibition".
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