An interview with Donald Trump
Donald Trump
Donald Trump born June 14th, 1946 (Gemini)
During an unsettling séance, the Ouija board has determined that Donald Trump is probably the reincarnation of a neighbor of Mozart

Do you have any scar?
I have a little coffee bean shaped scar on my right shin, a memory of my challenging quarrel with a drunk gazelle.

President Trump, what can you tell us about your plans for education?
The matter is in the efficient hands of Elisabeth DeVos. I think she is completely qualified for the job since she is loved by all the teachers who want to continue teaching. However I have some ideas. For example, all the schools must be equipped with guns, since we must be prepared in case of North Korean invaders or a vegans' riot.

What is the strangest nightmare you’ve ever had?
Not actually a dream: I found myself alone in a barren dim space. A foul aftertaste in my mouth. Then I realized I got plastered at a rerun of "Big Top Pee-Wee" in a drab movie house near Sacramento.

Which is your favorite karaoke song?
I love to sing out loud at the top of my voice "Get Here" by Oleta Adams.

Apart from leading the nation, is there one thing you do exceptionally well?
Actually, I do a great imitation of a dog, usually for kids or everybody willing to disburse a large check.

What’s the best sound in the world?
Probably it is the calming sound of a bunch of new banknotes touching each other. However, my spokesman demands to write instead something more fashionable, for example "the infectious laugh of an exhilarated child " or "the relaxing purr of an unworried kitten".

Donald, where did you go on your last vacation?
Last summer I leased an exclusive palace in a hidden valley of Cyprus. The contract included a drawbridge to protect my privacy but also a crew of extras pretending to be paparazzi to let me feel at home.

Donald, do you like hedgehogs?
I don't believe so!

For which reason you do not like hedgehogs?
To be honest, they stink! And one hedgehog bite my grandpa's privy bits. That was one of the reasons I become the President of USA, so I should rethink my position on hedgehogs.

There is no possibility any of these is Donald Trump's home telephone number :
7139666912 608491609 2068547503 2476750709 9819571325 566754552 8814263350 468612365 7197492909 9353458956 4949433435 9309693009 5688056028 6151874444 4859270518 2917360218 6139044412 7573233844 6822939716 6320054541
I sat tight forever for the privilege to have a brief meeting with Donald Trump. The resulting interview was breathtaking, like "The Scarlet Letter" rewritten by Harry Potter. It was very lamentable that my ferret by accident shredded my only copy! After I punished myself, I struggled to recollect those fantastic words. I want to be straight, I'm not really confident this web page is a totally truthful run-down of our interview, and now I'm beginning to ask myself if it ever happened...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.