A conversation with Donald Trump
Donald Trump
Donald Trump born June 14th, 1946 (Gemini)
Due to a strange accident happened to his aunt, Donald Trump suffers from an irrational phobia for cookies and a rational one for porcelain dolls (pixabay photo)

Can you tell me the square root of 565665652?
I'm pretty sure that one of the possible answers is 93.

Being president is often stressful and dangerous for mental health. How do you face it?
As I have already twitted, I hit "sleazebags" back. It makes me feel so much better than seeing a shrink (which I never have!).

Donald, which is your position on scientific research?
I've already a bunch of suggestions for these so-called researchers. I absolutely want a way to derive oil from charcoal and charcoal from garbage and I also want a study that suggests that the vaccines are a conspiracy of liberals.

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Ah, I remember that many years ago I was traveling with a friend. You know, we were young and wild and so we did "it" in the forest, under the moon, in the heart of nature.

As everybody knows, the problem of irritable bowel syndrome in bobcats is attaining epic proportions. Is Donald Trump doing anything in this respect?
I guess! I will chastely sleep in a bunk bed with a devotee one night a month. The profits ($1,200 per night) will be granted to an organization for the cure of irritable bowel syndrome in bobcats.

Donald, should you give up business and politics, which kind of occupation would you pick up?
Probably that of sunset photographer, since I already have quite an experience in that field.

What do you eat between meals?
Canned baked beans with butter, a tuna slice, four broccoli florets, and a bit of tequila.

Donald, you have been seen in an embarassing location with a vip whose name or gender I'm not allowed to publish. Do you have any comment?
Thou, pribbling beef-witted barnacle! I strongly deny any such "occurrence", in particular one with E.O..

I may have a photograph.
Thou, spongy tickle-brained clack-dish! I'm sure the photo is just an impression...

An impression? Please, explain.
You know, just an impression. Like when you got the impression everything is all right and then for no reason at all your house is frisked by the SWAT looking for some illicit material a dude has left there. Is it all clear now?

I was joking, there is no picture at all...

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Donald Trump's home telephone number :
575186263 4030147568 3834767387 3771976293 8520178376 7054653376 200067792 8860925226 6266963601 7028055185 7704898495 8249884096 2082236990 265356886 249919753 2488335110 5435691964 6293021965 5796532781 4481186129
Celebrities are busy people. It's not easy for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Donald Trump completely alone and we obtained the interview above without his help. Therefore, this web page is an an esoteric transcription we obtained employing a professional telepath from Dallas.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.