If you could choose a someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
I'd have to say Euclid.
Your agent told me you are just back from a political tour in Tibet. How was the accomodation?
Actually, I lived 4 full weeks in a Tibetan monastery before I saw daylight and realized it was not the Sheraton hotel. Funny thing: I learnt the basis of bilocation.
Do you have any scar?
Jawohl! I have a tiny earthworm shaped scar on my right leg, a souvenir of my painful brawl with a drunk squirrel.
Apart from leading the nation, is there one thing you do exceptionally well?
Well, I can deliver "If I Can Stop One Heart From Breaking" by Emily Dickinson backwards in 4 different languages including Chinese.
President Trump, you have fiercely opposed against Obama's healthcare reform. What is your take now?
As usual I've a lot of ideas for a healthcare reform. My plan is to make mandatory to study 1.5 years of medicine which should be good enough, at least to cure the losers that can't pay true physicians.
Can you tell me the square root of 1015799811?
No, I thought that numbers with so many digits could only be telephone numbers, or my revenues, not real numbers.
President Trump, what are you plans about sport?
I realized that currently most of the sports are humdrum. Sports miss that spark that encouraged people to throng the freak shows. In this regard, I'm pondering about a new sport like football but less effeminate. Just imagine a blend of cagefighting and tennis but with more injuries. Throwing in a few guns would be such a good addition.
What's the most uncanny dream you have ever had?
I dreamed being spanked by the ghost of Queen Victoria. I kept repeating "I did not sell my aunt's gazelle".
• e-mail: yutmeyut -at- gmail.com • Disclaimer & Privacy •