A talk with Eric Clapton
Eric Clapton
Eric Clapton born March 30th, 1945 (Aries)
Few people know that Eric Clapton has registered a patent for a steampunk baby stroller. (source)

When you were a little boy, did you see yourself as a professional singer?
Really? I did not. My imaginary friend and I decided that I would have become an accountant. But, that's life.

Do people yell your name and follow you everywhere you go?
Hell yeah! Sometimes my popularity frightens me. I'm inescapable: I'm known to elate famous astronauts and commonplace housewives alike. Say, there are at least 14 parks with my name in three different countries, not counting Kiribati and Molvanîa.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Probably Forrest Gump.

Not to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, don't you?

Eric, which is your favorite fruit?
It is called "Eric's wonder". During one of my famed wanderings in the Hymalayas, I discovered an inconspicuous unknown plant, now named Protocladia communis, which every 8 years blooms and gives fruits whose flavor reminds of pears and sesame oil. It may sound unpleasant, but it's easy to get the habit.

Eric, have you made plans for the New Year?
Well, I have some legal concerns about my contract, so to make a long story short, next year I will use the name "Eric Clupton".

As everybody knows, the problem of amebiasis in groundhogs is attaining gigantic dimensions. Are you doing something to alleviate the problem?
Surely! I will platonically sleep in a bunk bed with a supporter one night a week. The profits ($1,000 per night) will be granted to a charity for the cure of amebiasis in groundhogs.

If there was a movie produced about your life, who do you think should play you, and why?
It's a no-brainer: Tom Hardy. I think we are on the same page about Darth Vader.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Eric Clapton's secret telephone number :
5407159311 2694656113 6579684814 8266074599 361860977 3958094695 2729134610 2338694745 7747492996 6642414902 3161826186 8370057001 3954739711 6561866532 5835944348 4739302451 304836739 7665246109 2583547356 9031678154
To be frank, my boss had scheduled my hurried talk with Eric Clapton months beforehand. Unluckily, my pet hedgehog got dengue, so I had to skip the appointment. So, this web page is essentially based on what Eric Clapton would have probably said if I have met him, as suggested by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.