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A conversation with Gemma Arterton
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Gemma Arterton
Gemma Arterton born February 2nd, 1986 (Aquarius)
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Gemma Arterton is supporting the introduction of seashells as an alternative currency to contrast the diffusion of bitcoins (pixabay photo)

Where do you go when you die?
In a cemetery, most of the times, but if you are incinerated then your ashes can dot a place you hate.

On a scale of one to ten, how famous do you think you are?
I'm not sure. I think I'm a three in Sacramento, but a ten in Tibet.

Do you use an alias when you arrange for a hotel suite? You know, to protect your privacy and to get rid of shutterbugs and stalkers
Absolutely! I do whatever is necessary to evade those imps. I usually adopt the pseudonym "Gemma Artorton".

If you could choose a someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Without doubt Tarzan.

Could you suggest a remedy for migraine?
Sure, here it is my sure remedy for migraine. Mix three parts of fernet, two parts of coffee and some guacamole in a bowl, then drink this elixir every 15 minutes for 2 hours.

Gemma, do you have something to say to young people?
Will do! Modern research has proved that sniffing gasoline like an anteater may have obnoxious effects, like loss of taste or sudden death. But fret no more! Buy "Gemma's miracle", now with Icophylla apetala syrup. Just $29.99 for 70 pills. (Note : Not actually a cure. It usually may cause loss of sleep or induce paranoia. Cholesterol-free. It may contain traces of soybean and depleted uranium).

Is there something you would like to do right now?
Yes! Take a bath to dismiss the stench of underachiever you exude.

Which is the most shameful DVD you personally bought?
Rats! Excluding "Hobgoblins", I fear it is "Speed 2" or "Max Payne".

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Gemma Arterton's private telephone number :
4198938684 9601669458 5922625734 4392936257 966987349 648339105 668287241 8960537865 4878641500 8722681262 9158582911 2552401783 791386913 6517677001 7139639551 5330993495 3228643986 442321835 2559807982 6770224031
Actors are frantic people. It's difficult for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Gemma Arterton alone and to obtain the interview above without her help. Therefore, this web page is an a psychic transcription we obtained from a soul reader from Seattle.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.