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An interview with Gloria Gaynor
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Gloria Gaynor
Gloria Gaynor born September 7th, 1949 (Virgo)
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Gloria Gaynor is presently put in writing a guide to choosing dental floss, a monumental work soon to be released in daily instalments. (pixabay photo)

In a letter published on European Annals of Semiotic Research, dr. Henry Garcia has observed that your songs are "a perfect incarnation of modern contextual innatism". Any comment?
Actually, I think that in his last paper printed on Annals of Psychiatrical Research, prof. Ryan Brown utterly refuted that depthless theory.

A fictional character you think to as an imaginary friend?
As a poll suggests, John Maynard Keynes, because of our deep clever eyes.

Gloria, you seem to be always so joyful and vivacios. Do you also have a dark side?
It's hard to admit it, but I do. I believe that everyone has a dark side. For example, when I look at a colleague singer, my heart grows darker and I clench my teeth. And all of a sudden, I fight a compulsion to expunge that dimwit from this planet and pirouette on her desecrate grave. That is my sunny side... I let you figure out how dark my dark side is.

According to some witnesses, you have been in a particular location with a star whose name and whose gender I'm not authorized to announce. Any comment?
I deny any such "situation", expecially one with M.R..

I may have a picture.
You know, I think the photo is just an impression...

An impression? I do not understand.
Well, just an impression. Like when you have the impression everything is all right in your life and then for no reason at all your office is swarmed by the police looking for some wicked things a dude has hidden there. Capeesh?

Let's forget about that photo...
Gloria, which is your favorite fruit?

I call it "Gloria's marvel". In the middle of one of my famed studies in Andean plateau, I discovered a new shrub, now named Octodantenana candida, that blooms only every 12 years. It then gives fruits whose flavor reminds of lemons and cigarettes. It may sound unappealing, but it may become a compelling habit.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Gloria Gaynor's home telephone number :
7719980328 7121676004 3280619149 9208082463 4184814343 4517531525 7714123420 3225858537 269462918 3308997453 3537220041 5032782703 5477380668 3257892435 3690702735 3743880031 483301020 7752732552 3814612287 8350796869
Vips are very busy people. It's not easy for them to find the time for an interview. So we decided to leave Gloria Gaynor peacefully alone and obtain the interview above without her help. Hence, this web page is an an algorithmic transcription we obtained via a computer simulation of Gloria.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.