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A conversation with Haley Webb
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Haley Webb
Haley Webb born November 25th, 1985 (Sagittarius)
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Haley Webb has started a petition for the universal revival of the Mayan calendar (source)

Who were you in your first school play?
I remember it well. It was a play on the life of Pancho Villa. I was the comic relief in the part of his funny cousin.

What’s in your pocket right now?
I got a shitload of banknotes in my pockets. You may watch them in awe, you can ever smell them, but they are mine, all mine. My preciouss roll of banknotes...

If you could choose a someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
I'd have to say Samuel Johnson.

Which super power do you have?
I can walk on liquid fire, since I was 3.

When you were a little girl, did you see yourself as a professional actress?
Yes, even though it actually was my second choice. First one was pope. Or maybe farmer, I could never decide.

Do you ever Google yourself?
Say every three hours. But lately Google says "Including results for Haley Wabb", who supposedly is a wool classer from Denver. That's quite dispiriting, but not as much heartbreaking as finding that according to Yahoo my name sounds like a revolting curse in Klingonese.

Your zodiac sign is Sagittarius. May I read you your horoscope?
As you want, but I don't believe in zodiacal drivel.

Involuntarily, you are in a troublesome position that hampers you from doing those things that you are inclined to do. You can take your fate into your hands by cloistering yourself for 6 months in a convent.
Whammo! If I did believe in this zodiacal chicanery, now I would feel like a gnawed bone.

And now a bunch of numbers which are not Haley Webb's home telephone number :
9498910029 4052178254 3406462232 970727890 5011566949 7280282777 2205593985 5833349097 3017487498 515513975 7831771525 214500750 7794426154 2794580144 6518560963 203366676 5302004712 2914740150 3596032638 3843586696
To be frank, my director had patiently lined up my brief conversation with Haley Webb several months beforehand. Unfortunately, I decided at the last moment that I had better things to do, like collecting light bulbs or breeding scorpions. So, the transcript above is essentially based on what Haley Webb would have probably said if I have met her, as suggested by a telephonic poll involving a couple of her fans.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Woody Harrelson Kurt Russell Joseph Gordon-Levitt Olly Murs Jay Baruchel Amy Macdonald Ashley Judd Ashley Tisdale Goldie Hawn Sarah Shahi Jonathan Groff Kim Basinger Tricia Helfer Paula Abdul Eva Green Sofía Vergara Ewan McGregor Olivia Munn Bradley Cooper
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.