An interview with Imogen Poots
Imogen Poots
Imogen Poots born June 3rd, 1989 (Gemini)
And now, instead of Spanish inquisition, enjoy a cute photo of a cat (pixabay photo)

Your zodiac sign is Gemini. Are you a typical Gemini?
Not on a chance! I'm agreeable, vivacious, strong-minded and anxious. My relatives say that I'm also a bit inconsistent but that I think it is normal in artist.

Do people scream your name and ask for autographs everywhere you go?
Certainly! I'm like a medicine, a Godsent one, for the mass. I really make no distinction as to gender or occupation: I gladden renowned Oscar award winners and hopeless accountants alike. Say, there are 15 streets with my name in two different countries, not counting Taronia and Djibouti.

Do you know any good hangover cures?
Definitely so! In case of drunkness mix two parts of red wine, three parts of fruit drink and some sesame oil. Drink the resulting mixture every 10 minutes for 3 hours.

Have you ever participated in a séance?
Yep, just once. It was an extremely unsettling experience. At a certain point, the ghost of Leibniz appeared and established that almost surely I'm the reincarnation of a neighbor of Francis Bacon.

What do you think about the international situation?
I think it is unfortunately quite harsh, since there are nations where it is difficult to find even an almost adequate hamburger with or without mustard.

I heard that you will soon participate to a charity football match. Would you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humiliating effort?
I had to. Because of the astral conjunction, you know.

And how long have you been feeling a need to inform people about bronchitis?
Oh, since always.

Imogen, do you like hedgehogs?

Why you do not like hedgehogs?
First of all, they stink! And one hedgehog bite my grandpa in his naughty parts. This is one of the reasons I become an artist, so I should reconsider my position on hedgehogs.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Imogen Poots' private telephone number :
3013909192 6393209080 2764200319 3748124918 4881228204 853028760 6234577445 9332096195 8696779558 9687013497 8515337667 9932633664 6641614251 4255310393 3716750474 787752903 413411443 326065480 3356491425 9383993604
To be honest, my chief had patiently lined up my meeting with Imogen Poots weeks beforehand. Unluckily, I realized at the last moment that I had better things to do, like growing mosses or learning Tibetan. So, the transcript above is essentially the elaboration of a dream that followed after a large dinner based on cabbage stew and beans.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.