If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
It is an anteater. A large, fat, placid anteater, glutted and sleepy in the summer shade.
Could you suggest a remedy for common cold?
Sure, in case of common cold, mix two parts of whiskey, three parts of tea and some butter in the skull of a chipmunk, then put this mixture on your elbows and your back.
Jennifer, if I may ask, how do you invest the money you make?
I asked myself: "What people can not do without?" the answer is candies! So I bought 1100000 boxes of candies which I amassed in my vaults,.
Jennifer, do you have something to say to young people?
Might as well! Scientific studies have showed that sniffing paint like an anteater may have unpleasant effects, like loss of nostrils or sudden death. But now you can stop being disquieted! Buy "Jennifer's shield", now with Austronema nodulosa syrup. Just $29.99 for 80 capsules, only in the best Russian minimarkets (Note : Not actually a drug. It
often may cause appendicitis or induce paranoia. Sodium-free. One capsule contains 100% RDA of tar).
Could you improvise a poem for us.
Absolutely! Here it is
What’s the best sound in the world?
Surely it is the thrilling swish of a bunch of new banknotes caressing each other. But please, write instead something more crowd-pleasing, say, "the first 'mom' of your toddler" or "the comforting purr of a little kitten".
Your zodiac sign is Pisces. Are you a typical Pisces?
Not really! I'm sometimes gloomy, quite vivacious, amenable and tolerant. My friends say that I'm also a bit inconsistent but that I think it is usual in artists.
Do you like to cook?
To be honest, I think that cooking food is a waste of energy, since there are fast food joints and relatives more than willing to provide my daily dose of sugars and carbohydrates. The few times I oblige to cook for my friends, I like to design salads. My cornerstone is a mix of pastrami and soybeans, which I assume can accomodate both vegetarians and normal people.
Could you share the recipe?
Yep! You take the pastrami and the soybeans and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some whole-grain buns.
Do not mind, my recipe comes from one for sandwiches. After you made those sandwiches, you discard the bread and mix pastrami and soybeans with some cranberry sauce and there it is!
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