A talk with Jessica Chastain
Jessica Chastain
Jessica Chastain born March 24th, 1977 (Aries)
Among the future projects of Jessica Chastain there is a super-secret Sundance-Festival-friendly western film in which all the action takes place on a moon of Saturn (source)

Could you tell us something about your ongoing project?
I'm in the middle of filming the sequel of "The Adventures of Pluto Nash", a timeless masterpiece whose meaning has not been perceived.

Which is your earliest memory?
I have a clear memory of the moment I saw the light. It was a day in March. An almost perfect spring day, fragrant of flowers and glistening buds. And I was there, soaked from head to toe with blood and other bodily fluids, in a room full of people screaming like wolves. The first, but not the best day of my life...

You make me feel lucky.
You are too soft. My whole existence is like a stroll into the suffocating darkness. And I like every moment of it.

If there was a movie produced about your life, who do you think should play you, and why?
Without doubt Emmanuelle Chriqui. We are on the same page about HAL 9000.

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Surely Morticia Addams.

Not to offend you, but you know that that's not a real person, right?
It's not!? How could you say that to me so empty-heartedly!?

Do you know any good hangover cures?
Yes, in case of drunkness mix one part of brandy, three parts of instant coffee and some tomato sauce. Apply the resulting brew on your forehead and your ankles.

You appear to be always so joyful and sunny. Do you also have a dark side?
I do. I believe that each one has a dark side. Sometimes, when I see a so-called artist, hate makes my legs shake and my teeth chatter with fury. And then, without warning, I feel an impulse to kill her grinning smile. That is my bright side... I let you figure out how dark my dark side is.

Jessica Chastain refused to let me know her private telephone number, but here are some random numbers you can dream about :
4074924499 4716000758 7168822929 2826352906 4393702110 7829167901 5274781569 3960602878 752604574 3784765712 9740444564 6503878205 2187063629 6659837686 8372963482 3181478122 2361345281 3350451565 9354779063 6557966464
To be frank, my supervisor had scheduled my meeting with Jessica Chastain days beforehand. Unfortunately, I decided I had more interesting things to do, like breeding newts or collecting toothbrushes. So, the transcript above is mainly the recollection of a nightmare I had following a dinner of cabbage stew and chorizo.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.