A talk with Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson born July 10th, 1980 (Cancer)
Her early breakfast when she is on diet (pixabay photo)

Which super power do you have?
Fattening fast, particularly if it's cloudy. Probably this is not so remarkable in tall people with Scottish forebears.

I read that you will soon participate to a charity cooking marathon. Would you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a titanic effort?
I was obliged by my momma, who wouldn't stop repeating how it would have been such a good idea.

And how long have you been feeling a need to inform people about bronchitis?
Since my pet gerbil showed some symptoms.

Could you tell us which is your earliest memory?
I'm the testimonial for a new eau de toilette called "My Earliest Memory", so I cannot speak about the subject.

I would like to test it on unaware passerbies.
You are out of luck, it will be distributed only in Bhutan and Syldavia.

Who are your heroes?
Marie Curie, Keyser Soze, and myself.

What’s your worst defect?
Most people believe I incarnate perfection, but sometimes I drink ketchup from the bottle.

Where will you go on your next vacation?
For my next holiday I leased a chic mansion on the secluded mountains of Zubrowka. The only difficulty was finding a way to make a payment in bitcoins to the affable realtor from Nigeria that proposed me the affair by email.

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Jessica Simpson's secret telephone number :
277449966 9686695309 9419446673 630456473 6878037886 862662422 5775663025 892573752 3441314362 5570451410 7047375842 7997815507 836505694 5253266359 9515172160 5577909160 685591420 977700235 6008724384 866834831
Vips are very busy people. It's not easy for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Jessica Simpson alone and obtain the interview above without her help. Therefore, this web page is an a cybernetic transcription we obtained thanks to a computer simulation of Jessica.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.