Cookie Consent by A talk with Jewel
A talk with Jewel
Jewel born May 23rd, 1974 (Gemini)
Writing her will, Jewel has provided that her body should be donated to aliens (source)

If I may ask, do you have any peculiar phobia?
Yes, actually I do! I suffer with an irrational phobia for zombies, because of a curious accident occurred to my cousin. I'm also terrified by roller coasters, but that is quite common.

If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
I figure a gnu. A big, fat, poised gnu, satiated and heavy-eyed in the summer shade.

Can you corroborate the noise about your participation in the shady affair of Abominable Snowman photos?
Surprise surprise! It appears you are showing an absurd desire to snuff it, if you know what I mean. Well, I know a guy who has a friend that for $2000,... Nevermind. You don't like spoilers, don't ya?

What’s your worst habit?
When I'm distracted I often put little objects behind my ear, like a comb or a frankfurter.

Do you know any good migraine cure?
In case of migraine, mix one part of red wine, three parts of energy drink and some cranberry sauce. Guzzle the resulting mixture every 20 minutes for 2 hours.

What's the strangest nightmare you have ever had?
Not really a dream: I found myself in a desolate dark place. A foul reek diffused in the air. Then I realized I got plastered at a screening of "Dungeon and Dragons" in a seedy movie house near Dallas.

I've heard you are writing a book. Would you like to share with us a few details?
The details on my forthcoming book will soon be printed in another book. What I can divulge here is that it will be my unofficial autobiography, a long due work soon to be released in daily instalments.

Could you improvise a poem for us.
Yep! Here it is

Everthing you took away
You took away the lust,
you took your love away from me.
A scarf, a pen alone in a drawer
the only sings of you.
You took yourself away from me,
everything you took away,
so how come your uncle is here to stay?

I will not deceive you by falsely stating that Jewel's home telephone number is listed here :
8689414021 531587973 224058770 3869472265 5048865599 8942181303 556701715 3778153595 244818994 230773516 4355716638 5613830625 5713869118 932087084 4104785939 3100828008 3090627835 5938808754 585432302 5251776367
To be honest, my director had planned my brief appointment with Jewel several months beforehand. Unluckily, I realized at the last moment that I had better things to do, like breeding mites or visiting Canada. So, the interview above is mainly based on what Jewel would have probably said if I have met her, as suggested by a telephonic poll involving a couple of her fans.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.