Joseph, what are your feelings about president Trump?
I'm somehow preoccupied, since I heard that Trump wants to standardize the number pi to be equal to 3.1.
Which brand of toilet paper do you use?
Franky, common brands are for common people. My personal hand-made toilet paper is obtained from the leaves of Bellesma apetala, a rare parasitic orchid which grows only in Borneo.
Joseph, where did you go on your last holiday?
Last summer I rented a fashionable villa on the secluded hills of Burundi. The payment included barbed wire aplenty to preserve my privacy and also a crowd of local extras impersonating shutterbugs.
I read that you will soon participate to a charity cooking marathon. Care to tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a titanic effort?
I had to. Because of the astral conjunction, you know.
And since when did you feel a need to inform people about dengue?
WHAT? Dengue!? That's not what my agent told me. I have to call my agent.
You appear to be always so sprightly and positive. Do you also have a dark side?
It's hard to admit it, but I do. I think that each of us has a dark side. For example, when I see a colleague, irritation darkens my soul and I grind my teeth. And suddenly, I sense the need to estinguish that moron from this planet and jump on his cold grave. And then there is my dark side... You do not want to anything to do with that side.
If there was a movie produced about your life, who do you think should play you, and why?
It should be Jake Gyllenhaal, since we were in the same book club when we were in fifth grade.
What’s your biggest defect?
When I'm distracted sometimes I go about with small things behind my ear, like a pen or a sausage.
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