What’s your biggest defect?
It may happen that I rap my fingers on bottles and also on people heads.
Do you do your own shopping?
I'm too hard-pressed performing very paramount things for all the people to care about things of no importance. Usually, I pay a number of Harward graduates to compile my grocery list and pass it along to a crew of professional buyers around the globe. For the clothes, I ever employ a gang of stand-in, one for each body part.
Nowaday the problem of brucellosis in koalas is reaching gigantic dimensions. Is Joseph Morgan doing anything in this respect?
But of course! I will platonically sleep in a bunk bed with a supporter one night a month. The profits ($900/night) will be granted to an organization for the cure of brucellosis in koalas.
I've heard you are writing a book. Would you like to share with us a few details?
The details on my forthcoming book will soon be published in the book itself. What I can say here is that it will be my unauthorized autobiography. It will be tattoed on foreheads and backs of 900 models that will be dispersed in Peoria as in a flash mob.
Your zodiac sign is Taurus. May I read you your horoscope?
Please proceed, my supporters say I'm a sucker for zodiacal chicanery.
You will ram into a totaled stranger from Tucson, a drainer named Albert with an orange peel in his left pocket. He will show you a map signed by the wicked pirate Sir Henry Morgan, that places his gold in a desolated abbey in Pennsylvania. Don't believe him!
Alakazam! That seems a little too specific...
According to some witnesses, you have been in a particular situation with a superstar whose name and whose gender I'm not allowed to reveal. Care to comment?
Do you mean K.W.? That was a totally harmless thing. I deny any other "situation", expecially one with Q.W...
I may have a picture.
You know, the photo is surely just an accident...
An accident? I do not understand.
Yes, accidents occur all the time. Like when you "accidentally" fake a picture. Or, for example, your father or your car may "accidentally" burst into flames. Do you understand now?
Now that I look it under a better light, the picture is indistinct...
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