An interview with Jude Law
Jude Law
Jude Law born December 29th, 1972 (Capricorn)
Jude Law likes to imagine that in a parallel dimension he is a slice of pizza (pixabay photo)

Jude, how do you invest all the dough you make in your career?
He said it is a secret, but I invested quite a bunch of money in a super-clever scheme invented by a financial genius named Charles Penzi, a pro of high-yield investment programs. I can give you his number, but he has been incommunicado in the last weeks.

I read that you will soon participate to a charity football match. Care to tell us why'd you decide to undertake such an effort?
I had to for a small clause in my last contract, which prescribed me to fake an interest in good deeds.

And since when did you feel an urge to fight tennis elbow?
Since I was a little boy, and my parents would argue about it.

Jude, you are always in fine fettle. How do you do that?
I have invented the Blue Diet: in April I eat only blue foods, like blueberries, blue Smarties, blue potatoes and my special Smurf hash.

Jude, which is your method for unblemished skin?
It is a weekly shower in fresh unicorn tears.

If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
Surely a raccoon. A big, fat, tranquil raccoon, satiated and somnolent in the shade of a large tree.

What have you got in your pocket?
As this interview is a fantasy of your lascivious imagination, I'm completely in the nude, so no pockets at all.

Are you aware of the rumors about you and the bulldozer appearing in your last movie?
Pfft! I'm going to repeat it for the last time: I did not have any relation with that bulldozer.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Jude Law's secret telephone number :
5625945423 4893956541 8154377408 7963159264 5457640022 7510931666 9952840590 6252411347 330947489 407592231 8343408613 4143542672 9818183733 8494852325 254808882 4922642507 935092475 6642405201 6579182523 2243139420
Let's face it, actors are very frantic people. It's not easy for them to fix an appointment for an interview. So we decided to leave Jude Law peacefully alone and to obtain the interview above without disturbing him. Therefore, this web page is an a psychic transcription we obtained thanks to a professional mind reader.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.