An interview with Katie Holmes
Katie Holmes
Katie Holmes born December 18th, 1978 (Sagittarius)
As a kid Katie Holmes showed an untoward inclination to exotic food like fried frog legs and tacos (pixabay photo)

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Every day! I mostly consume super-natural indie products, because I do care about my skin and our world. For example, this week I have a crush for tempeh and kale chips, both amazing on chicken nuggets.

Katie, what’s your worst defect?
Maybe my worst defect is self-absorption. Obviously, I'm too wonderful to be an egotist, but generally I simply ignore what people say and I think these white shoes are like the devil's handshake.

Did you ever participated in a séance?
Yes! It was an unsettling experience. Suddenly, the ghost of Abraham Lincoln manifested and established that almost surely I'm the reincarnation of Steven Hawking's butcher.

Do people yell your name and applaud everywhere you go?
Yeah! At times my popularity frightens me. I make no distinction as to race, sex, or religion: I'm known to be popular among prominent heirs and desperate sewer inspectors in the same fashion. It's nice to know that there are 14 boulevards with my name in four different countries, not counting Kiribati and Lilliput, which I did not know they were countries.

Can you substantiate the buzz about your involvement in the rogue crisis of Chupacabra photos?
Stap my vitals! You have an odd desire to kick the bucket, if you read me. I know a guy who has a friend that for $1000,... Whatever. You don't like spoilers, don't ya?

I've heard you are about to publish a book. Would you like to share with us a few details?
The details on my imminent book will soon be published in the book itself. What I can say here is that it will be a guide to choosing wallpaper, a long due work soon to be released in montly instalments.

If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
Surely a gazelle. A big, fat, tranquil gazelle, full and sleepy in the shade of a large tree.

Could you improvise a song for us.
No problem! Here it is

Everthing you took away
You took away your love,
you took your passion away from me.
A pen, a scarf alone in a drawer
the only sings of you.
You took away my life,
all that matters you took away,
so how come your uncle is here to stay?

There is no possibility any of these is Katie Holmes' secret telephone number :
4486621570 4252097127 256464844 8436953283 8723784093 2408698292 4743481064 4376395049 642207655 2673627245 8368214504 2493268373 9551214012 664522725 9823044627 8191488557 498127360 2577280970 2867770691 3187362032
Clearly, actors are very frantic people. It's difficult for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Katie Holmes alone and we obtained the interview above without disturbing her. Thus, this web page is an an algorithmic transcription we obtained via a computer simulation of Katie.
Other interviews worth checking:
Donald Trump Serinda Swan Samuel L. Jackson Richard Madden Allison Williams Gene Wilder Jason Momoa Clint Eastwood Matt Smith Allison Williams Johnny Depp Randy Crawford Céline Dion Chris Pratt Kristin Hersh Benicio Del Toro Kenny Chesney Maisie Williams Alyssa Milano David Guetta
NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.