Cookie Consent by An interview with Kelis
An interview with Kelis
Kelis born August 21st, 1979 (Leo)
Her early breakfast when she wants to travel light (pixabay photo)

Can you confirm the gossip about your role in the flimsy incident of Abominable Snowman photos?
Heck! I believe you are showing a surprising desire to imitate dodo. Capishe? Well, you know, I know a guy who knows a guy that for $1000,... Whatever. You like surprises, don't ya?

Kelis, you are also well known for your unconventional demands when staying in hotels. Can you tell us why and maybe make an example of something you usually ask?
Lately I've found that I can't live without brisket-flavored cotton-candy or one of Martin Scorsese's unreleased movies delivered everyday to my suite.

What motivates you to sing?
It's less tiring than actually working...

What would you like to do right now?
Take a nap on your couch.

Which is the coolest flag in the world?
Surely the flag of Panem. If I'm not mistaken, it is gray and green with a little green dog in a corner. Panem is an amazing but desperate country. They are so needy they recycle dandruff.

Can you tell me the square root of 310957847?
I think that one of the possible answers is something around 43.

What are you working about?
I'm writing the music score for a remake of "Parting Shots", an underestimated masterpiece whose value has not been perceived by viewers.

Indiana Jones, Lara Croft or Professor Layton?
The one in the kids' game, of course.

Kelis refused to divulge her private telephone number, but here are a few random numbers you can dream about :
5018119379 7082548227 8771425547 5046712904 812640514 901094998 4582635938 9572859714 7267847329 2051800034 5905800550 2625080123 4826869498 2816596598 9800739708 9656993329 500881061 7977392558 2941251643 5241069707
I patiently dawdled for weeks before being able to have a brief talk with Kelis. The resulting piece was fantastic, like it was written by H.G. Wells at his peak. It was untoward that my uncle Albert (maybe on purpose!) set my only copy on fire! After I emerged from coma, I attempted to summon up those wondrous words. So, to be aboveboard here: I'm not so sure this web page is an entirely genuine run-down of our meeting, and I'm beginning to ask myself if it actually took place...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.