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A conversation with Kristen Wiig
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Kristen Wiig
Kristen Wiig born August 22nd, 1973 (Leo)
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Kristen Wiig is currently composing a guide to choosing dental floss, a monumental work soon to be released in daily instalments. (pixabay photo)

Kristen, where did you go on your last vacation?
Last month I leased a fashionable villa in a secluded valley of Lithuania. The contract included a moat around the villa to ensure my privacy and also a crew of extras portraying hysterical fans.

Do you know Ruth Robinson (a former variety artist, now a vehicle painter) from Mesquite?
Not personally, but my uncle has been briefly married to her. Then there was a public embarrassment about the curious suicide of a former lover, so their marriage came to an abrupt end.

What do you eat between meals?
Crackers with black vinegar, a kale leaf, three peaches, and a bit of vermouth.

Do you have any vice?
Surfing on the dark corners of Internet when I'm supposed to work. Well, probably you are going to judge me for that. Luckily another vice of mine is I couldn't care less.

Kristen, you are also well known for your particular requests when staying in hotels. Could you tell us why and maybe make an example of something you usually ask?
Kristen needs what Kristen needs, and she generally gets it. Whether it's one of Francis Lawrence's movies or pure actinium.

Which is your favorite book?
I'm very attached to "The Hunger Games" by Suzanne Lollins.

You mean, by Suzanne Collins?
Maybe you are confusing the book with the movie, but I've heard it both ways.

Do you Google yourself often?
Say every other day or so. But lately Google says "Including results for Kristen Woig", who allegedly is a former poultry farmer from Atlanta. That's quite dispiriting, but not as much upsetting as finding that according to Yahoo my name is similar to a terrible insult in Chinese.

There is no possibility any of these is Kristen Wiig's home telephone number :
520841015 9247510799 6412299162 6780219772 9575940665 9094157592 5822747652 2813250141 946827545 917784523 3380347712 681215015 780649735 3126690717 6904448893 8911014929 594637783 4412419429 520476778 7743716808
Actors are very over-booked people. It's difficult for them to schedule an interview. So we decided to leave Kristen Wiig peacefully alone and we obtained the interview above without disturbing her. Thus, this web page is an an esoteric transcription we obtained employing a professional mind reader from Tucson.
Other interviews worth checking:
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.