An interview with Kylie Minogue
Kylie Minogue
Kylie Minogue born May 28th, 1968 (Gemini)
And now, for no reason at all, look at a photo of a lovely squirrel (pixabay photo)

As everybody knows, the problem of argyria in rabbits is attaining gigantic dimensions. Is Kylie Minogue doing anything in this respect?
Indeed yes! I will chastely sleep in a bunk bed with a supporter one night a week. The profits ($1,300/night) will be granted to a foundation for the cure of argyria in rabbits.

In an essay published on Canadian Anthropological Studies, dr. Joe Collins has observed that your songs are "a supernatural archetype of present-day pragmatic anarcho-capitalism". Which is your reaction?
Yes, it is evident that in his letter printed on American Journal of Symbolic Empiricism, prof. Dennis E. Cruz totally discredited that forced assumption.

Which is your technique for flawless skin?
As you may have guessed, it is a sponging with lukewarm unicorn tears once a day.

Kylie, do you have any vice?
It is telling the truth when it no longer seems like a virtue. I’m probably going to be condemned for that. Luckily another vice of mine is I don't give a monkey's.

Kylie, some witnesses have seen you in a particular situation with a celebrity whose name I'm not authorized to release. Care to comment?
If you mean X.F., then it was an absolutely irreproachable thing. I deny any other "situation", expecially one with T.N...

I may have a picture.
Well, the photo has probably appeared spontaneously...

Spontaneously? I do not understand.
Yes, some stray photons spontaneously formed a totally random photo in which you mistakenly pinpointed me. For example, given the right conditions, your office or your mother could "spontaneously" explode. Is it all clear now?

Let's forget about that hypothetical photo...

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Kylie Minogue's home telephone number :
2810339717 2178558259 592103739 4425147062 9716772200 602056289 771672606 6170963492 7419079460 7289535006 505532524 951657102 575838673 3443223871 759897382 6009454353 4403706560 2406345455 5984781270 735486532
I patiently sat on my bottom forever for a chance to have a brief meeting with Kylie Minogue. The resulting article was jaw-dropping, like "Slaughterhouse-Five" rewritten by the Incredible Hulk. It was damaging that my ferret devoured my only copy! After I left the padded cell, I struggled to recall those awesome words. Actually, to be clear here: I'm not so sure this web page contains a perfectly accurate account of our conversation, and now I'm starting to wonder if it actually was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.