Are you aware of the rumors about you and the ferret appearing in your last movie?
Frick! No comment.
Apart from acting, what one thing do you do better than anybody else?
Actually, I can balance a sigarette on my nose.
Could you suggest a remedy for hay fever?
Will do! Here it is my instant cure for hay fever. Mix two parts of tequila, one part of instant coffee and some paprika in the skull of a monkey, then drink this elixir every 10 minutes for at least 3 hours.
Do you like to cook?
I'll say not! But I like to improvise salads. My most cherished one is a mix of spam and soybeans, which I believe can be fine for both vegetarians and normal people.
Could you share the recipe with us?
Sure! You take the spam and the soybeans and you make a bunch of sandwiches using some French rolls.
It does not matter, I derived the recipe from one for a sandwich. So you make the sandwiches, then you cast off the bread and mix spam and soybeans with some bbq sauce and voilà, you are done!
How do you invest all the dough you made in your career?
Well, I invested my fortune in a money-making scheme developed by a financial genius named Charles Penzi, a pro of offshore investments. I can give you his phone, but I wasn't able to reach him in the last few weeks.
Which is the most blush-making DVD (or blu-ray) in your collection?
Goodness gracious! Apart from "Swept Away", which was a gift, I fear it is "Body of Evidence" or "Catwoman".
• e-mail: yutmeyut -at- gmail.com • Disclaimer & Privacy •