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A talk with Lana Parrilla
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Lana Parrilla
Lana Parrilla born July 15th, 1977 (Cancer)
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The typical appearance of her fans (pixabay photo)

How is your relationship with movie directors?
I really got along pretty well with most of them, but I dream they will be replaced soon by computers.

What do you have in your pockets?
This is a tricky one. Because this interview is a creation of your lascivious neurons, I'm totally stark-naked, so no pockets at all.

Could you tell us something about your future project?
I'm in the middle of filming the remake of "Next", a real classic whose significance has not been perceived.

When you were a little girl, did you see yourself as a professional actress?
Go jump in a lake! My father and I decided that I would have become a carpenter. But, things don't always go as planned.

Lana, what is the fuss about the next Oscar debate?
Surely, this has always been a hot potato.

Your line of work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To make my ego stronger, I often take a siesta on a mattress made of rough sandpaper and nails abundantly peppered with vinegar.

Which is your method for eternal beauty?
It is an ablution with cement once a month.

What do you eat between meals?
Tomatoes with Alfredo sauce, a yogurt, two carrots, and a glass of fernet.

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Lana Parrilla's private telephone number :
6942274136 652384074 518054785 5644360162 215508462 3489890560 7021437919 300152158 297640746 740730598 5317730293 8484762185 7028028906 8134926416 7946588174 848191202 4034348844 5918458708 8025179748 7067418662
Let's face it, celebrities are frantic people. It's difficult for them to find the time for an interview. So we decided to leave Lana Parrilla peacefully alone and to obtain the interview above without disturbing her. Thus, this web page is an a cybernetic transcription we obtained via a computer simulation of Lana.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.