A conversation with Lauren Graham
Lauren Graham
Lauren Graham born March 16th, 1967 (Pisces)
Less known fact: Lauren Graham is proficient in Mok'bara, the Klingon martial art (source)

In a paper appeared on Annals of Symbolic Technology, prof. David Harris described your movies as "a dramatic recapitulation of modernistic conceptual irrationalism". Which is your reaction?
Yes, I think that in his last essay published on International Semiotic Journal, dr. Peter Campbell totally invalidated that bizarre observation.

Apart from acting, is there one thing in which you beat everybody else?
I do a great imitation of a weasel, mostly for kids or everybody willing to wait the 20 minutes I need to find inspiration.

Indiana Jones, Lara Croft or Professor Layton?
I don't give a damn.

If there was another movie produced about your life, who do you think should play you, and why?
It should be Emma Stone. I always liked her as Yoda.

Lauren, you are always in tip-top condition. Which is your secret?
I have devised the Blue Diet: during the month of July I eat only blue foods, like blueberries, blue crabs, robin's eggs and my special Smurf stew.

What have you got in your pocket?
I got a shitload of money in my pockets. You may stare at them in awe, you may ever lick them, but they are mine, all mine. My preciouss roll of notes...

Which is your favorite brand of toilet paper?
In my opinion, common brands are for common people. My personal hand-made toilet paper is obtained from the fibers of Leocisuria aphylla, an almost extinct shrub native of Archenland.

Have you ever had a supernatural experience?
Every day! I mostly eat super-natural indie products, because I do pay attention to my skin and my fans. For example, this week I have an obsession for moringa fruits and tempeh, both amazing on BBQ pork ribs.

And now a bunch of numbers which are not Lauren Graham's secret telephone number :
831652120 2052971875 8001307162 770810142 312927201 7180579547 503748802 873160180 584102079 8646559718 4286665360 9556399016 4832557112 204570425 2305416019 7299598141 4288365850 330239690 9107233865 882878086
My supervisor had patiently set up my brief appointment with Lauren Graham days beforehand. Unfortunately, I decided I had better things to do, like collecting light bulbs or growing parasitic plants. So, this web page is essentially based on what Lauren Graham would have probably said if I have met her, as suggested by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.