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An interview with Leonard Cohen
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Leonard Cohen
Leonard Cohen born September 21st, 1934 (Virgo)
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In his will, Leonard Cohen has specified that his ashes should be scattered on the Moon, possibly by hand. (source)

Could you improvise a lyric for us.
Yes! Here it is

Everthing you took away
You took away your passion,
you took the respect away from me.
A photo, a comb lost in a drawer
the glum reminder of you.
You took away all that I had,
all that matters you took away,
so how come your mother is here to stay?

What do you think about the international situation?
Kerboom! I think it is quite bleak, since there are countries where it is difficult to find even an almost decent Long Island iced tea.

What’s in your pocket right now?
I got a stack of banknotes in my pockets. You may watch them in awe, you may ever lick them, but they are mine, all mine. My preciouss roll of notes...

When you were a little boy, did you see yourself as a professional singer?
Sadly no, and I still dream that, one day, I will get a real job.

Your zodiac sign is Virgo. May I read you your horoscope?
Yes sir! But I'm a bit partial regarding zodiacal foolishness.

You have gathered a lot of dissatisfaction in you that can burst without notice. You will feel yourself again only if you absolve or kill somebody who has wronged you in the past.
Gadzooks! You are spot on!

Imagine that there is somebody in a remote place of the world who'd never heard you. How would you describe your music to him?
Well, pilgrims sometimes recount that there are one or two such dudes in the Sahara desert or in the Amazon rainforest. I would say that my songs are like a delicious blueberry cupcake with an astounding inner core of spiced tofu.

Apart from singing, is there one thing you do better than anybody else?
Actually, I can repeat "If" by Rudyard Kipling backwards in 6 different languages including Tibetan.

After extensive reserch I concluded the following list doesn't contain Leonard Cohen's secret telephone number :
3277398623 3150592668 4079381447 709952968 9890359818 3251091590 6658830338 7487535781 3443471070 4000990453 6134386779 734383435 4703911943 9985755077 3489282998 730382919 3452897383 4174560229 9392439385 7796609736
Clearly, celebrities are over-booked people. It's difficult for them to fix a meet for an interview. So we decided to leave Leonard Cohen completely alone and obtain the interview above without his help. Therefore, this web page is an an esoteric transcription we obtained via a professional telepath from Fresno.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.