Cookie Consent by A conversation with Lindsay Lohan
A conversation with Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan born July 2nd, 1986 (Cancer)
In her recondite cavern Lindsay Lohan is patiently looking for a way to grow ducks with 4 legs (pixabay photo)

Some witnesses have seen you in a compromising location with a celebrity whose name I'm not authorized to reveal. Do you want to comment?
If you mean N.Y., then it was a totally irreproachable thing. I deny any other such "situation", expecially one with S.X...

I may have a picture.
Well, I think the photo is just an impression...

An impression? I do not understand.
Yes, just an impression. Like when you got the impression just everything is fine and then for no reason at all your parents and your dear one burst into flames. Do you understand?

I think you are right, this is actually a picture of my mother-in-law with a wig...
What's the most uncanny dream you have ever had?

Not really a dream: I found myself alone in an empty dark space. A rotten taste in my mouth. Then I remembered I got hammered at a screening of "Color of Night" in a faded drive-in near Los Angeles.

Lindsay, how do you invest the money you make acting?
If you are interested, I can contact some gentlemen from Colombia who can make you a juicy offer. All you have to do is give them a photo of your kids as a sign of your good faith.

What’s the best sound in the world?
Honestly? It is the exciting swish of a bunch of new banknotes touching each other. However, my agent prefers you write instead something more likeable, for example "the snore of your sleeping kid" or "the contagious giggle of an innocent kid ".

Are you aware of the rumors about you and the dog appearing in your last movie?
I don't see why such a small wrongdoing has all of a sudden made everyone mad.

And now a bunch of numbers which are not Lindsay Lohan's secret telephone number :
5549843289 760759716 5076418786 9609438257 3971904274 7048471231 2461987620 883496255 4278264455 485822089 531286565 8297139058 4634643414 2999120351 290614427 4441133018 8825438602 9968635838 9173223534 5185501671
I patiently sat on my bottom for many years before being able to have a hurried interview with Lindsay Lohan. The resulting transcription was magnificent, like "Catch-22" rewritten by Wolverine. So, it was awfully deplorable, to put it mildly, that my armadillo shredded my only copy! After I punished myself, I attempted to summon up those awesome words. To be clear here: I'm not really sure this web page is a completely accurate report of what transpired during our meeting, and thus I'm starting to doubt it actually was real...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.