Which brand of toilet paper do you use?
I really can't use commercial products. My toilet paper is obtained from the petals of Galeocyphella clavata, a rare parasitic orchid which grows only in the Amazon rainforest.
Can you tell me the square root of 611407393?
According to my speechwriter the most appropriate answer is something around 22.
Do you do your own shopping?
Nix! Usually, I pay a team of Harward dropouts to compile my grocery list and e-mail it to a crew of professional buyers around the planet. For the clothes, always a critical issue, I ever retain a number of surrogates, one for each body part.
If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
Probably a fox. A big, fat, serene fox, well fed and somnolent in the shade of a large tree.
Lorde, your zodiac sign is Scorpio. May I read you your horoscope?
OK, my friends say I'm a sucker for zodiacal craziness.
You have accumulated a great deal of resentment in you that can pour out viciously suddenly. You will feel yourself again only if you condone or murder somebody who has angered you in the past.
Very well! If I did believe in this zodiacal gibberish, now I would be somehow dispirited.
Lorde, what are your feelings about the current USA president?
I guaranteed my niece I would not imprecate in public anymore, so I'd pretend I did not understand the question.
Which is the coolest flag?
I think it is that of Lilliput. If I'm not mistaken, it is black and gray with a tiny orange elk in a corner.
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