A conversation with Lucy Hale
Lucy Hale
Lucy Hale born June 14th, 1989 (Gemini)
Lucy Hale is always looking for new ways to stay in touch with her devotees. (pixabay photo)

Lucy, can you share with us a memory of your role in "Scream 4"?
Rubbish! All the leading actors were eating fish sauce flavored bonbons all the time.

Do you have problems with movie directors?
In principle I have no problems, except that time in which (probably there was a stand-in strike) a director begged me to drink melted wax, which was somehow strange, since that scene was not in the script.

Do you do your own shopping?
I'm so hard at work performing very paramount things for the planet to care about such trivias. I have a group of Georgia Tech PhDs to compile my grocery list and pass it along to a crew of pro buyers scattered around the planet. For the garbs, always a critical issue, I ever employ a gang of stand-in, each sharing with me one body part measure.

What motivates you to act?
As Nero Wolfe said, "An actor can practice anywhere any time with anybody, and most of them do."

Your agent told me you are just back from a filming location in Tibet. How was your stay?
To be frank, I lived 3 weeks in a Tibetan monastery before I got the idea it was not the Best Western hotel. Funny thing: I learnt to levitate just a little.

Lucy, do you like raccoons?
I'd say no!

For which reason you do not like raccoons, if I may ask?
First of all, they stink! And one raccoon bite my cousin's intimate parts. That was one of the reasons I become an actress, so I should rethink my relation with raccoons.

In a paper published on American Annals of Qualitative Objectivism, dr. Peter Long observed that your movies are "a tragic embodiment of modern symbolic pragmatism". Any comment?
Actually, in his essay appeared on Journal of Metaphysical Criticism, prof. George Hughes utterly invalidated that incoherent observation.

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Lucy Hale's secret telephone number :
3585112382 5188195297 5608653700 2264591873 8320897863 9068083402 9094764567 7781158472 429720731 417880895 7869821607 5375459093 463957947 2893514401 946527289 657729280 4094183875 4654596306 6408328031 4742231979
To be honest, my supervisor had patiently scheduled my short exchange with Lucy Hale several months beforehand. Regrettably, I fall asleep watching a rerun of "Crazy On The Outside". So, the interview above is essentially based on what Lucy Hale would have probably answered if I have met her, as suggested by a telephonic poll involving a couple of her fans.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.