Could you improvise a poem for us.
Sure! Here it is
What would you like to do right now?
Deride somebody's else style of life.
Which is your favorite brand of toilet paper?
I can proudly confess that I have my own exclusive brand. My personal toilet paper is obtained from the fibers of Echinocopredea aquatica, an almost extinct bulb native of Ecuador.
What’s the best sound in the world?
Honestly? It is the soothing swish of a roll of new banknotes kissing each other. However, my agent asked to write instead something more likeable, say, "the snore of your sleeping son" or "the jubilant giggle of a happy child ".
If I may ask, how do you invest all the dough you made?
Say, when rotary phones will be fashionable again people will stop laughing behind my back.
Mädchen, what is the fuss about the current Oscar quarreling?
Frankly, this is a minefield.
Do you know any good hangover cures?
I think I will! Here it is my guaranteed remedy. In case of drunkness mix two parts of sparkling wine, one part of ground coffee and some wasabi. Apply the resulting concoction on your feet and your wrists.
You have been the recipient of uncountable awards. Can you tell us what is the first award you ever won?
I won the "Platinum Panda Award" assigned by the municipality of Fresno for "phenomenal and unrequested stage exhibition" at the age of 10.
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