An interview with Melanie Lynskey
Melanie Lynskey
Melanie Lynskey born May 16th, 1977 (Taurus)
During the month of September Melanie Lynskey usually eats exclusively blue foods, like blueberries, blue potatoes, blue Smarties and the so-called Smurf stew, whose details are a disquieting riddle we prefer to leave wrapped up in its mystery (source)

I'm here tonight with Melanie Lynskey, who just made her way through her last movie. Hi, Melanie, and welcome to Gnaw Your Celebrity!.
It's a pleasure being here, your pleasure.

Are you aware of the rumors about you and the footrest appearing in your last movie?
My demeanor was strictly professional.

When your are not on the set, which is your preferred diversion?
I think that collecting and trading USB keys is quite relaxing.

Are you allergic to anything?
Yes, I have a little intolerance to hamster tears, lye and rainbows.

What do you think about the last Oscar dispute?
Frankly, this has always been a minefield.

What motivates you to act?
The fact that, as Nero Wolfe said, "An actor can practice anywhere any time with anybody, and most of them do."

What’s the best sound in the world?
Probably it is the consoling tinkle of two pieces of gold caressing each other. But please, write instead something more suitable for publication, for example "the calming purr of a lovable kitten" or "the first word of your baby".

Could you improvise a song for us.
Sure! Here it is

The hare of remorse
The gray hare of remorse
feeds on the dismal grasslands of mourning
while I stare at the lonelyness of my life.
If only it had been the pig of remorse
I could have bacon at least.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Melanie Lynskey's secret telephone number :
4922669868 9349190707 955086083 3350568024 683522770 9345192467 3550386604 8579068191 5018875734 380435864 6114287994 4323909498 596354417 6565018415 493462769 477248491 9861361356 675099377 209212801 2323834447
My boss had set up my little appointment with Melanie Lynskey several days beforehand. Regrettably, I realized at the last moment that I had more interesting things to do, like collecting horseshoes or cultivating lichens. So, the transcript above is essentially the impression of a dream I had following a heavy dinner of raw broccoli and chorizo.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.