A conversation with Michael Fassbender
Michael Fassbender
Michael Fassbender born April 2nd, 1977 (Aries)
Surprisingly, Michael Fassbender's method for perfect skin is a daily ablution with lukewarm yak milk (source)

If you could choose someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
It's a no-brainer! Jessica Rabbit.

You know that that's not a real person, right?
It's not!? How could you say that to me so empty-heartedly!?

Do you know any good common cold cure?
Yes, in case of common cold, mix three parts of whiskey, two parts of ground coffee and some vinaigrette in a bowl, then guzzle this brew every 25 minutes for at least 4 hours.

Can you tell me the square root of 760320896?
I will not dignify you with an anwser, not even a wrong one.

Michael, do you have any vice?
Sloth. I find difficult to be out of bed until 2 PM I solved the issue by setting my clocks to Grenyarnia's time zone. See, I’m possibly going to be judged for that. Fortunately another vice of mine is I couldn't care less.

Michael, can you share with us a memory of your role in "Inglourious Basterds"?
Sure thing! The set was full of mites. They were coming outta the goddamn walls!.

Which is your favorite karaoke song?
My real love is Beethoven.

If I may ask, how do you invest the considerable fortune you make acting?
I invested my fortune in a super-clever scheme devised by a financial guru named Charles Punzi, a pro of hedge futures trading (whatever it means). I can give you his number, but I wasn't able to reach him in the last few weeks.

Here is a list of numbers I have already excluded from being Michael Fassbender's private telephone number :
432681562 817561730 9607065508 9716907940 7600425905 2029214994 6133943941 6117625454 7142463150 3169859272 614451342 6353922924 849201481 660459715 5349079930 858748716 428505020 4315919995 9775717995 941329882
I waited for several weeks for an occasion to have a hurried interview with Michael Fassbender. The resulting article was staggering, like it was written by the spirit of William Faulkner under the influence of too much vermouth. Thus, it was very deplorable that my armadillo destroyed my only copy! After I restored my sobriety, I tried to remember those marvelous words. To be frank, I'm not really so confident this web page contains a perfectly accurate account of what transpired during our meeting, and thus I'm starting to wonder if it ever happened...
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.