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An interview with Monica
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Monica
Monica born October 24th, 1980 (Scorpio)
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In August Monica usually eats only blue foods, like blueberries, naturally deceased blue jays and the so-called Smurf meat pie, whose details are a disquieting riddle we prefer to leave wrapped up in its mystery (pixabay photo)

Do you have any new tattoos?
Actually I do! I have a brown cat on my arm. It contains a tracker, so I can be find if I get lost in a storm of snow, but unluckily it works only if I'm slightly disrobed.

Monica, should you give up singing, which occupation would you choose?
Probably that of football mascot, since I already have some experience in that field.

Monica, how do you invest all the dough you made?
If you want to become rich fast, I can contact some financial advisors from Russia who can show you how to double your stake. When you deal with them, bear in mind they already know where your kids go to school.

If you could choose a someone to reincarnate in, who would it be?
Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

If I may ask, do you have any particular fear?
I have developed an unreasonable fear for butterflies, owing to a curious accident happened to my uncle. I'm also scared by dark places, but that is quite normal.

A famous person you think to as an imaginary friend?
As several people say, Charles Darwin, because of our awesomeness.

I read that you will soon participate to a charity cooking marathon. Would you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such an embarrassing effort?
I had to for a clause in my last contract, which prescribed me to do something unfunny at least once.

And since when did you feel an urge to fight hypermetropia?
Oh, since always.

Almost surely none of the following numbers are Monica's private telephone number :
8532036983 2422416573 7196654416 778469088 6480762540 6935367537 4847189537 3401638573 5393587575 426100911 7936064612 7539111797 3306924012 6185159978 684822718 7344979037 5764656395 6783966223 7069860803 6918412495
To be sincere, my chief had arranged my hurried rendezvous with Monica many weeks beforehand. Unluckily, I decided at the last moment that I had better things to do, like walking my pet coyote or cultivating poison ivy. So, the transcript above is mainly based on what Monica would have probably answered if I have met her, as suggested by a statistics involving a couple of random people.
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NOTE: the above interview may not reflect reality.