If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
I figure a zebra. A large, fat, placid zebra, gorged and dozy in a summer breeze.
In an article appeared on Canadian Journal of Ethical Topics, prof. David Rodriguez observed that your movies are "a perfect paradigm of modernistic symbolic futurism". Any comment?
Yes, I think that in his paper published on Annals of Rural Sociology, dr. George Myers totally refuted that eccentric theory.
Should you give up acting, which kind of occupation would you like to pick up?
Almost surely that of roadkills collector, since I already have some experience in that field.
Could you suggest a remedy for back pain?
For certain! Here it is my sure panacea for back pain. Mix three parts of tequila, one part of lemonade and some lemon juice in the skull of a panther, then put the resulting concoction on your back and your chin.
Is there a deep moral hidden in your "Irreversible"?
Yes, that the exception proves the rule - or something like that.
Monica, if I may ask, how do you invest all the dough you made in your career?
I asked myself: "What do people like?" and the answer is candies! So I bought 2100000 boxes of candies which I stashed in my castle, waiting for the price to go up.
I read that you will soon be busy with a charity marathon. Can you tell us why'd you decide to undertake such a humiliating effort?
I had to for a little clause in my last contract, which forced me to fake an interest in good deeds.
And how long have you been feeling a need to make people aware of allergy?
Oh, since always.
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