Could you suggest a remedy for haemorrhoids?
Sure, here it is my guaranteed quick fix for haemorrhoids. Mix three parts of tequila, one part of ground coffee and some olive oil inside a coconut, then guzzle this concoction every 25 minutes for 2 hours.
Do you have a favorite book?
I'm really fond of "The Grapes of Wrath" by John Stainback.
You surely mean, by John Steinbeck?
I doubt it, in any case we can agree to disagree.
If happiness were an animal, what would it be?
Probably a prairie dog. A big, fat, serene prairie dog, gorged and somnolent in the shade of a large tree.
Do you have any scar?
Actually, I do. I have a tiny doorknob shaped scar on my left shin, the result of my unpleasant skirmish with a maniacal moose.
Have you ever participated in a séance?
Yep! It was a very unsettling experience. Suddenly, the spirit of Oliver Cromwell manifested and revealed that I'm the reincarnation of Pancho Villa's cook.
What do you think about the international situation?
It's hard to figure it when you live between cushions pampered by capable servants, but on our bitter planet there are countries where it is difficult to find even a barely so-so margarita.
Your work is often stressful. How do you face it?
To strengthen my spirit, I frequently take a nap on a hammock made of rough sandpaper and poison ivy.
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